Boss Is Away Comic Strips
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1000 Results for Boss Is Away
View 1 - 10 results for boss is away comic strips. Discover the best "Boss Is Away" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday February 08,
2017
Keeping The Boss Away
Tags #managers, #interference, #huddle, #scrum
Transcript
Boss: What time is the team huddle? Dilbert: I can't tell you. As the team scrum, it is my job to keep you from interfering. Boss: Then I guess we're both doing what we're supposed to do. Dilbert: Sadly, yes.
Sunday February 05,
2012
Tags #boss, #business lunch, #employee, #freedom from tyranny, #lunch, #talk work, #waddle, #waddle away
Transcript
Boss: That restaurant was great. Dilbert: I know. I plan to go there someday for lunch. Boss: We just ate lunch. Dilbert: That wasn't lunch. Boss: It wasn't? Dilbert: You talked about work the entire time. Lunch is not defined by food. It's defined by freedom from tyranny. My lunch hour will begin the minute you waddle away. Was this going well until I said "waddle?"
Sunday May 25,
1997
Tags #discouraged, #pointy haired boss, #pep talk, #dead end job, #grinding away, #high blood pressure, #stock options, #doctor kevorkian
Transcript
Asok, Alice, Dilbert and Wally sit at a conference table. Asok says, "Lately I've been feeling discouraged about my job." Alice says, "You should talk to our pointy-haired boss." Wally says, "That'll cheer you up." Asok says, "Maybe you're right. All I need is a little pep talk from our leader." He leaves the room. Alice, Dilbert and Wally laugh. Asok sits across from the Boss's desk. The Boss says, "You think YOU're discouraged . . ." The Boss continues, "I've been stuck in this dead-end job for years, grinding away, day after day." The Boss continues, "And all I have to show for it is high blood pressure and worthless stock options." Asok looks frightened. Dilbert and Wally stand behind Asok's desk. Dilbert says, "It's so gratifying to watch them grow up." Asok says into the telephone, "I need the number for Doctor Kevorkian."
Saturday January 26,
1991
Tags #the boss, #Dilbert, #employee meeting, #wilson, #recognition, #twenty-hour, #overworked, #success
Transcript
The Boss gestures toward an employee and says to Dilbert and another man, "I'd like to recognize Wilson for working twenty-hour days and making the project a success." The man says, "Thanks, but I'm not Wilson. He quit months ago." The Boss says, "Oh . . ." The Boss walks away thinking, "I've got to sop calling this the employee recognition program."
Wednesday August 07,
1991
Tags #alice, #the boss, #baby, #Dilbert, #Wally, #boss, #butt head, #maternity leave, #pregnancy, #women's rights
Transcript
Alice, Dilbert and a man sit at a table eating lunch. Alice is holding a baby in her arms. The Boss enters and says, "Alice, I've been thinking . . . Since your baby was born in the office, have you considered naming it after your boss?" Alice replies, "As a matter of fact, I DID name him after you." As the Boss walks away, Alice says, "Want some more milk, 'Butt Head?'"
Saturday September 14,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #dance, #paycheck, #mine, #twice, #big, #money, #buy, #happiness
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk. The Boss dangles a check from his fingers and says, "It's pay day." The Boss yells, "Ha ha!! Dance for your paycheck!! Ha ha ha!! Mine is twice as big!!" The Boss walks away thinking, "And they say money can't buy happiness."
Thursday November 21,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #profits, #low, #training, #class, #cute, #jumpy
Transcript
The Boss says to Dilbert, "Dilbert, profits are too low. I've got to let you go . . ." Dilbert says, "What!!" The Boss continues, ". . . To a training class." The Boss walks away thinking, "They're so cute when they get jumpy."
Tuesday January 07,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #morale, #building, #experiment, #slap, #fly swatter, #feel, #better
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk. The Boss stands behind him holding a fly swatter. The Boss says, "Hold still. I'm going to try a morale-building experiment." The Boss slaps Dilbert on the back of his head. The Boss walks away saying, "Thanks. I feel a lot better." Dilbert looks angry.
Friday May 22,
1992
Tags #the boss, #dave, #haircut, #management, #fast-track, #program, #hair
Transcript
Dave sits at his desk. The Boss enters and says, "Dave, I hear that you've started cutting your own hair . . ." The Boss continues, "I'm afraid I'll have to drop you from the management fast-track program." The Boss walks away thinking, "Lucky we caught that one before he got too far."
Saturday May 30,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #consultant, #advised, #handle, #sneaking, #stamping, #cancelled, #understand, #goodyear, #blimp
Transcript
The Boss says to Dilbert, Wally and Alice, "My consultant advised me to handle the layoffs in a direct, professional way." The Boss holds up a rubber stamp and continues, "So, throughout the day I'll be sneaking up on people and stamping 'Canceled' on their backs." As Wally runs away, Alice says, "Let me see if I understand . . ." The Boss points and says, "Hey! Is that the Goodyear blimp?"