Bragging Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

23 Results for Bragging

View 1 - 10 results for bragging comic strips. Discover the best "Bragging" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #coffe lounge, #more vocal, #accomplishments, #bragging, #perfect substotute, #wind, #seat cushion

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I think I need to be more vocal about my accomplishments. Wally: I've found that bragging is a perfect substitute for accomplishing stuff. Dilbert: I plan to do both. Wally: Wow. You are the wind beneath my seat cushion.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #carbon dioxide, #exhales endangered species, #fabrications, #harbard, #higgs boson particle, #licorice and flashlight, #national football league, #no bragging rights, #no kids, #training for olympics

View Transcript

Transcript

Coworker: My daughter is training for the Olympics. My son is going to Harvard. Dilbert: I have no spawn of my own, so I claim the right to name a proxy to brag on my behalf. Topper, I need you. Topper: OF course you do. My daughter discovered the Higgs boson particle using nothing but licorice and a flashlight. My son inhales carbon dioxide and exhales endangered species while playing in the National Football League. Coworker: This isn't fair! You can't just make up stuff! Topper: According to the president of the International Society of Boasters, fabrications are acceptable. Coworker: I'd like to talk to that guy. Topper: You're looking at him. Dilbert: I win.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cep, #obscenely wealthy, #guest house, #build house, #speech writer, #workers, #made him rich, #bragging, #condescending, #truth

View Transcript

Transcript

Ed stands at the podium and says, "As CEO, I thank you for making me obscenely wealthy." Alice, Wally and Dilbert continue to sit and listen. Ed goes on to say, "Yesterday, I built a guest house using bundles of cash as bricks." Ed looks down at his paper, thinking "I need a new speech writer."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bragging, #hours per week, #made up, #reorganized pattern, #seventy hours, #sixty hours, #complaining

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert, Wally, and Alice are eating lunch. Dilbert says, "I worked sixty hours last week." Alice replies, "That's nothing. I worked seventy hours." Wally says, "That's nothing..." Wally continues, "Oh, wait... I just recognized the pattern."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bragging, #rudeness, #selfishness, #stories, #goat cistume, #donated organs, #hollow torso, #backpack, #zipper, #family of squirrels

View Transcript

Transcript

Topper Returns Dilbert says, "I dreamed I was wearing a goat costume." Topper says, "That's nothing!" Topper says, "I donated all of my organs to sick people. Now I use my hollow torso like a backpack." "Dilbert says, "And I tried to go on a date." Topper says, "See my zipper? I took in a family of squirrels!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #informing, #admitting, #laziness, #bragging, #shocked

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says, "We've never worked together so let me tell you how this will go down." Wally says, "You'll expect me to contribute, and you will be disappointed at every turn. In the long run you will do everything yourself." Woman says, "How do you stay employed?" Wally says, "DOn't make me call myself a genius."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #temp, #talking, #bragging, #rude, #mean

View Transcript

Transcript

Overqualified temp Overqualified temp says, "My last job was ambassador to Brunei. Before that I was undersecretary of commerce." The boss says, "Maybe the other admins can watch how you make copies and learn something." The boss thinks, "She's a talker."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #temp, #angry, #bragging, #fighting, #violence, #injury, #pain

View Transcript

Transcript

Overqualified temp Asok the intern says, "It's funny that you're a Rhodes scholar yet you can only find work as a temp." Asok the intern says, "I am only an intern and yet I enjoy the power and prestige of being your supervisor." Asok the intern says, "In retrospect I shouldn't have challenged her to a cage fight."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #reading, #bed, #power, #flaunting, #bragging

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert says, "Does my vast wealth make you feel inadequate and sad?" Dilbert says, "No, not really." Dogbert says, "How about now?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #money, #happy, #bragging, #angry, #economy, #value

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol says, "I live in a rented trailer, and all of my money is in my checking account." Carol says, "Your investments are worthless and your mortgage is underwater. My net worth is higher than yours now." Carol says, "I guess promiscuity and a G.E.D. was a pretty good strategy for me after all."