Bribery Comic Strips
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8 Results for Bribery
View 1 - 8 results for bribery comic strips. Discover the best "Bribery" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday September 06,
2004
Tags #bridery, #boss, #bribery dvd, #prepping, #money, #offer, #sly, #meeting, #drinks, #top secret, #business
Transcript
"If you recommend my company's product to your board, there might be a little something for you later." "Before you decide, look at this DVD titled, 'Is bribery right for you?'" "The narrator might refer to you by name when she dances."
Friday July 17,
2020
Boss Wins In Arbitration
Tags #accused, #arbitration, #bribery, #business, #covid, #employment, #fired, #job, #pandemic, #racism, #rotten, #system, #white supremacist, #Win
Transcript
boss and carol wearing face masks. boss: i was falsely accused of being a white supremacist and fired. but i won in arbitration and got my job back! carol: how did you win? boss: bribery. once you realize the whole system is rotten, it's easier.
Monday May 11,
2009
Tags #raise, #bribery, #agreement, #money, #clothes, #confused, #crime
Transcript
Catbert: Evil director of human resources Wally says, "According to the news, everyone in power is corrupt." Catbert says, "So?" Wally says, "If you give me a 20% raise, I'll kick back half to you." Catbert says, "Done." Dilbert says, "How did you afford a new vest in this economy? Crime?" Wally says, "I'm dabbling."
Thursday May 14,
2009
Tags #admitting, #criminal, #offer, #bribery, #accepting
Transcript
Wally says, "This week I sold company secrets, did some insider trading, and took kickbacks from vendors." Wally says, "I'll give you a taste if you look the other way." Zip! Dilbert says, "That's unsettling."
Wednesday October 14,
2009
Tags #senator, #bribery, #deal, #legislation, #law, #favor, #manipulation
Transcript
the CEO and the senator Dogbert says ,"It wouldn't be legal for me to bribe you." Dogbert says, "So I hired your wife as a consultant despite the fact that she thinks 'Present value' is some sort of gift card." Dogbert says, "And I wrote some legislation for you because you're a lazy thief." Senator says, "Ha ha! Let's call that 'Access'."
Friday September 30,
2016
Wally Accepts Bribes
Tags #bribe, #bribery, #money, #laziness, #work ethic
Transcript
Wally: I started accepting bribes from co-workers to incent me to do my job. Dilbert: If it didn't work for your employer, why do they think it will work for them? Wally: Something about optimism. Dilbert: They didn't say why? Wally: All I know is that no one paid me to listen to them.
Saturday October 01,
2016
Trust Your First Instinct
Tags #bribe, #bribery, #laziness, #work ethic
Transcript
Boss: People are telling me you are accepting bribes to help co-workers on projects. Wally: You think I'm helping my co-workers? Boss: Good point. That part didn't sound right. Wally: Trust your first instinct.
Thursday July 25,
2019
Employee Engagement Survey
Tags #business, #employees, #managers & supervisors
Transcript
boss: the employee engagement survey results are in. aaand...not a single person answered the survey. looks like we have room to improve. dilbert: have you considered bribery?