Budget Cycle Comic Strips
310 Results for Budget Cycle
View 1 - 10 results for budget cycle comic strips. Discover the best "Budget Cycle" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share April 07, 1999's comic on:
Caption "The budget cycle" Wally and Asok sit at a conference table. Wally reads of a piece of paper and says, "And i'll need a helicopter, double rotor." Asok says, "If you have any resoect for me or the budget process, you will not ask for such obvious budget padding." Wally says, "And I'll need that chopper filled with Albino tiger cubs."
Share May 24, 2008's comic on:
Dilbert says, "My computer is broken. I need a new one." The Boss says, "We don't have the budget." The Boss says, "Do things that don't require a computer until the next budget cycle." Dilbert says, "Like churning my own butter?" The Boss says, "You make it sound creepy."
Share January 31, 2007's comic on:
The Boss: Our new philosophy is 'a bias for action'. Dilbert: Are we eliminating our Six-Sigma program, the budget cycle, ISO certification, and our approval processes? The Boss: Can I get back to you on that? Dilbert: Sure. No rush.
Share December 25, 2014's comic on:
Boss: I only have enough in the budget to hire an employee who is incompetent half of the time. But if I don't use the budget, I will lose those funds next year. Employee: And I am proud to say that I'm 75% competent. Boss: I wish I could afford that.
Share June 08, 2017's comic on:
Ted: You charged expenses to my project code. Dilbert: I had to because I don't have a budget. Ted: This will make it seem as if I went over budget while you didn't spend a penny. Dilbert: Good point. Wally: How's your project coming along with no budget? Dilbert: Better than I'd hoped.
Share January 13, 2011's comic on:
Tina says, "Did you hear that Dilbert and Alice are on the same Pon Farr cycle?" Carol says, "What?" Tina says, "Every seven years, engineers have an irresistible urge to mate. Their spawn would be the product of two engineers." There's a reason it rarely happens Dilbert says, "Your plan has unnecessary steps!" Alice says, "Your specifications are vague!"
Share February 03, 2011's comic on:
Dilbert says, "If we build our software with no bugs, we can make a 10% return on our investment." Dilbert says, "But if we do a poor job, we can make a 40% return by selling upgrades and service." Dilbert says, "But don't worry. We only have the budget for a poor job." CEO says, "I can't remember if we're cheap or smart." Boss says, "Phew!"
Share February 21, 2011's comic on:
Woman says, "You used the entire engineering portion of my project budget just learning the new technology." Wally says, "I'm sorry things didn't work out for you." Wally says, "Some say I'm a slow learner, but I like to think of myself as expensive."
Share March 14, 2011's comic on:
Dilbert: So... you emailed our CEO and asked for funds to build a social network for our global supply chain. Dilbert: No one wants that, But it sounds good, so he moved all of our project funding to your dumb idea. and...you will produce nothing, Wally: said the engineer with no budget.
Share November 24, 2011's comic on:
Unmotivated sales guy Man: My slides are blank because no one told me what our product does. And I don't have a compelling reason to find out because I don't work on commission. If anyone asks why you didn't place an order, would you mind saying you have budget issues?