Cannibal Comic Strips
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8 Results for Cannibal
View 1 - 8 results for cannibal comic strips. Discover the best "Cannibal" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday December 01,
2001
Tags #fired, #can't pay rent, #live in cubicle, #fires, #become cannibal, #regrets later
Transcript
The Boss stands in front of an employee. The employee exclaims, "I'm fired?!! Now I can't pay my rent!" The employee asks, "Would it be okay if I lived here in my cubicle?" The Boss responds, "I don't see why not." The employee asks, "Can I have fires and become a cannibal?" The Boss responds, "Well, I might regret this later......"
Thursday September 01,
2005
Tags #seat, #airplane, #cannibal, #sits next to, #hairy skull, #touch, #taunts
Transcript
FISH & AMMO "Why do I always get the seat next to the cannibal?" "These guys are all the same. I know what's going to happen next." "My hairy skull isn't touching you." "Right on schedule."
Thursday August 03,
1989
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #tennis, #cans, #cannibals
Transcript
Dilbert and Dogbert stand on a tennis court holding rackets. Dilbert asks, "Did you bring a can of balls as I asked you to?" Dogbert replies, "Uh . . . Did you say CAN OF BALLS? I'll be right back." Dogbert says to a cannibal in a grass skirt, "Sorry, turns out we don't need you after all." The cannibal asks, "How about if I just eat the loser?"
Tuesday June 30,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #snow, #mountain, #jet, #captain, #bob, #fly, #luck, #survive, #eat, #cannibal, #last
Transcript
Dilbert, Dogbert and several other passengers stand in waist-deep snow. Dilbert says, "We're alive . . . We must have been thrown clear when the jet hit the mountain." The airplane captain says to Dilbert, "I'm Captain Bob. Sorry about the crash. What are the odds I'd hit this same mountain on every flight?" As Bob walks away Dilbert says, "We're in luck. Captain Bob knows how to survive these situations." Bob thinks, "Nice folks. I'll eat them last."
Thursday July 02,
1992
Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #captain, #bob, #eat, #survivors, #cannibal, #mountain, #village, #message, #snowball, #snow
Transcript
Dogbert, Dilbert, a man in a pilot's uniform and another man stand on a snow-covered mountain where their airplane crashed. Dogbert says, "Captain Bob, I think you're planning to eat the other survivors." Captain Bob replies, "Ha ha! Too bad your only hope is to send a message to the village at the base of this mountain." Dogbert throws a snowball at the captain, knocking him off his feet. Dogbert says, "When you roll into town, tell them Dogbert sent you."
Sunday May 26,
1996
Tags #business language, #competetive, #salary increase goodbye, #core business, #lost, #empowered, #unimportant deciosns, #reengineering, #essential, #people person, #canibal, #hire trained people, #market driven, #balme cutsomers, #value employee input, #hour, #important
Transcript
Dogbert sits at a desk. The panel is titled "Business Language Explained." Someone says, "We have to be more competitive." Dilbert and Wally wear barrels instead of clothing. Wally says, "Nice barrel." Dilbert replies, "This old thing?" The caption says, "Meaning: Say goodbye to salary increases." Someone says, "We must focus on our core business." The Boss feels his head and says, "Hello." The caption says, "Meaning: We can't find our butts with both hands." Someone says, "You are empowered." Alice sits at her desk wearing a crown and saying, "I proclaim this to be 'Green Ink Day.'" The caption says, "Meaning: You're the monarch of unimportant decisions." Someone says, "We're reengineering your function." A man and a horse are kicked out an office window. The caption says, "Meaning: Adios, Tonto, and the horse you rode in on." Someone says, "Training is essential." A man at a desk asks, "You were a cannibal?" A man wearing a grass skirt and a bone in his hair replies, "I'm a people person." The caption says, "Meaning: We're trying to hire some trained people." Someone says, "We're market driven." A woman doing research asks a man, "What's your favorite odor?" The caption says, "Meaning: We blame customers for our lack of innovation." Someone says, "We value employee input." Dilbert tells the Boss, "Thanks for listening." The Boss laughs hysterically. The caption says, "Meaning: We think humor is important."
Wednesday August 31,
2005
Tags #meals on flight, #cannibals, #elbonian airlines
Transcript
"Are there meals on this flight?" "Yes, if you're a cannibal." Elbonia Airlines "That is not funny. After this flight, I'm going to complain to your supervisor." "Can you put me next to the plump guy?" "Sure. He's in B8."
Sunday August 06,
2017
Tags #greed, #scavenging, #cannibal, #furniture, #energy, #vibes, #health
Transcript
Alice: My chair is broken. I need a new one. Boss: You can take Ted's chair. I fired him this morning. Alice: That feels icky. Boss: It's just a chair. Alice: Ted was a creepy underperformer. I don't want his loser energy on me. Boss: That's your only option unless I fire someone else today. Alice: Okay, give me an hour to do some back-stabbing and rumor-mongering. Boss: I'll just let that situation work itself out. Alice: Nice chair. Dilbert: Why did my fight-or-flight instinct just kick in?