Cd Drive Comic Strips
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116 Results for Cd Drive
View 1 - 10 results for cd drive comic strips. Discover the best "Cd Drive" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday February 05,
2002
Tags #all natural, #cd drive, #holistic tech support, #natural and holistic, #tree bark, #meditate
Transcript
Dogbert talks into a telephone headset, "Hello. This is Dogbert's all-natural and holistic tech support." The man on the other end listens. Dogbert continues, "Try stuffing tree bark in the CD drive and meditating." Dogbert continues, "No, of course it won't damage anything; it's all natural!"
Wednesday November 04,
1992
Tags #Dogbert, #driving school, #student, #driver, #stereo, #signal, #car, #phone, #defrost, #window, #fishing, #driving, #simulator, #test, #drive
Transcript
Dogbert and a boy sit in a car with a "Student Driver" sign on the roof. Dogbert says, "With your right hand, insert a CD into the stereo . . . Good." Dogbert continues, "Now signal left! Answer the car phone! Defrost the rear window! Honk is you love fishing!" The student panics and tosses the phone into the air. Dogbert says, "Fortunately, we're only in the driving simulator." The car is sitting in a dealership showroom. A salesman approaches the car and asks, "Do you boys want to take it for a test drive?"
Friday May 20,
2011
Tags #computers & peripherals, #language, #no longer undertsnd, #employees, #to of touch, #technology, #gravitons, #warp drive, #rebalanced, #subspace responders, #business
Transcript
Boss: I no longer understand anything my employees say. I must be so out of touch with technology that I don't even recognize the words. Wally: I flushed the gravitons out of the warp drive and rebalanced the subspace responders.
Tuesday August 08,
1989
Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #brochures, #quiz, #toaster, #disk, #drive, #printer, #emergency, #electronics anonymous
Transcript
Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dogbert says, "Please read these brochures, it could save your life." Dilbert looks at a brochure and asks, "'Electronics Anonymous?'" Dogbert says, "Let's take the enclosed quiz. Number one: How many options do you have on your toaster?" Dilbert asks, "Does that include the toaster disk drive and printer?" Dogbert says, "I think we can skip directly to the emergency application form."
Thursday May 10,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #rock, #teenagers, #map, #x, #drive, #around, #rest, #year, #maps, #labeled
Transcript
Dilbert and Dogbert sit outdoors. Dilbert says, "I read that half of all teenagers can't locate this country on a map." Dilbert continues, "One frustrated teacher handed out maps labeled 'you are here.'" Dilbert continues, "She spent the rest of the year trying to explain why the 'X' doesn't move when you drive around."
Monday May 21,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #dinner, #car, #drive, #woman, #shallow, #difference, #parking lot, #thump, #mighty, #chest
Transcript
Dilbert asks a woman, ". . . So, would you like to meet after work and go to dinner?" The woman asks, "What kind of car do you drive?" Dilbert says angrily, "Ugh! You women are all so shallow!! It should not make one bit of difference what kind of car I drive!!" The woman replies, "Except that it will help me find you in the parking lot . . . But you could just stand on top of it and thump your mighty chest."
Saturday July 06,
1991
Tags #Dogbert, #television, #supreme, #ruler, #earth, #idiots, #drive, #happiness, #expectations, #chips, #king
Transcript
Dogbert sits on a pillow watching tv. He thinks, "The more I watch television, the more I wonder why I'm not already supreme ruler of earth." Dogbert walks away thinking, "Those people are idiots. They should all drive over here and proclaim me their king." Dogbert returns to the pillow with a bag of potato chips and thinks, "The secret to happiness is high expectations and your own bag of chips."
Thursday August 15,
1991
Tags #Dogbert, #car, #salesman, #woman, #old, #steal, #purse, #drive, #foot, #boss, #convince, #first born, #son, #relatives
Transcript
Dogbert says to a customer, "I asked the boss to sell it at your price." Dogbert continues, "He told me to drive over your foot and steal your purse." Dogbert continues, "Buy maybe I can convince him to take your first-born son instead." The woman says, "He IS my first-born son!!"
Saturday September 19,
1992
Tags #Dogbert, #vegetarians, #march, #capitol, #protest, #killing, #animals, #mile, #drive, #letters, #revolution, #people, #only, #plastic, #wooden, #shoes, #avoid, #Dilbert
Transcript
Dogbert stands on a ladder and addresses a crowd. Dogbert says, "Vegetarians, we must march to the capitol to protest the killing of animals!" A man in the audience says, "That's a mile away." Another man asks, "Can we drive instead?" A woman asks, "Or maybe write letters?" Back at home, Dilbert sits in his chair reading the newspaper and Dogbert stands on the hassock. Dogbert says, "Never lead a revolution of people who only own plastic and wooden shoes." Dilbert replies, "I try to avoid it."
Wednesday December 23,
1992
Tags #christmas presents, #Dilbert, #Wally, #christmas, #gift, #cd player, #Card, #shallow, #gesture
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk. Wally enters holding an envelope and says, "I'm collecting money for a gift to a poor family this Christmas." Dilbert opens his wallet and asks, "What are you buying them?" Wally replies, "A CD player." Dilbert says, "Thank you for making this the most shallow gesture of my life." Wally says, "I'll add your name to the card."