Closer To Department Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

232 Results for Closer To Department

View 1 - 10 results for closer to department comic strips. Discover the best "Closer To Department" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 20, 2007's comic on:

Tags #order from boss, #reptilian brain, #not apparent, #move cubicle, #closer to department

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss: "Alice, I want you to move to a cubicle closer to the rest of the department." Alice: "Is there a reason that isn't apparent, or is this coming from the reptilian part of your brain?" The boss: "How would you know?" Alice: "That's a surprisingly good point."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 29, 2011's comic on:

Tags #anxiety, #death & dying, #could go wrong, #did go worng, #closer to death, #creepy

View Transcript

Transcript

Russell: This past week, everything that could go wrong did go wrong. Dilbert: Look on the bright side: you're seven days closer to death. Man: Hey! That's true! Dilbert: It's creepy when that works.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 10, 1990's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #department, #secretary, #personal, #phone, #calls, #traditional, #costume, #countries, #calling, #cultural appropriation

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "Dilbert, I'm putting you in charge of the department secretary." The Boss continues, "See if you can get him to cut down on the personal calls." The secretary sits at his desk wearing a sombrero and holding maracas. Dilbert says, ". . . Just be a little more discreet . . . For example, try NOT wearing the traditional costume of the countries you're calling."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 12, 1990's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #boss, #supervise, #department, #secretary, #gibberish

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: My boss asked me to supervise the department secretary. I don't really know how to manage people... Dogbert: Try positive reinforcement. Praise the things he does right. Trust him to make the right choices. Man: I forgot to write down your messages, so I just put a bunch of gibberish on little pieces of paper.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 13, 1990's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #secretary, #department, #image, #problem, #crush, #paper clip, #Dogbert

View Transcript

Transcript

A man asks Dilbert, "How's the new secretary for the department working out?" Dilbert replies, "I think he's having a self-image problem." The secretary sits at his desk and says, "Sure, I'm a secretary, but watch me crush this paper clip!!"

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 15, 1990's comic on:

Tags #witch, #accounting department, #Dilbert, #chains, #man, #woman, #gender, #sex & gender, #figures, #Number

View Transcript

Transcript

A witch sitting on a throne points at Dilbert and yells, "Fool! Why have you come to the accounting department?!!" Dilbert is wrapped in chains and guarded by a troll holding a spear. Dilbert says, "Uh . . . I had some questions, sir . . . Ma'am . . . Er, sir?" Dilbert asks, "Are you a man or woman?" The witch replies, "In accounting, it doesn't really matter."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 03, 1991's comic on:

Tags #the boss, #Dilbert, #department, #machines, #filled, #bird, #bobs, #head, #three, #birds, #job

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits across from the Boss's desk. The Boss says, "I've decided to replace your department with machines." The Boss points to a toy on the desk and says, "Your job will be filled by this little bird that bobs his head up and down." Back at home, Dilbert tells Dogbert, ". . . Then I said 'Ha! It would take at least THREE of those birds to do MY job!"

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 10, 1992's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #company, #person, #brains, #department, #body, #engineering, #snot

View Transcript

Transcript

A man says to Dilbert, "Think of the company as a person. We in marketing would be the 'brains.'" The man continues, "The sales department would be the 'body.'" Dilbert asks, "What's engineering?" The man replies, "The snot."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 07, 1992's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #general, #department, #government, #cover-ups, #u.f.o., #abduction, #story, #untraceable, #poison, #good, #value, #tax, #dollar, #breath, #mint

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert opens the door and sees a man in a military uniform. The general says, "I'm a General from the Department of Government Cover-ups." The man continues, "If you tell your U.F.O. abduction story to the press we'll slay you with untraceable poison." Dilbert says, "I don't think I'm getting a good value for my tax dollar here." The General asks, "Breath mint?"

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 15, 1992's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #tina, #sales, #department, #boss, #new, #hurt, #customers, #new guy, #despise, #account, #i hate you

View Transcript

Transcript

A woman approaches Dilbert and says, "So . . . Dilbert, welcome to the sales department. I'm Tina, your new boss." Dilbert holds out his hand and says, "Hi." Tina says, "As the new guy, you get the customers who despise our products and want to hurt us personally." A man climbs onto Dilbert's back and beats him on the head while yelling, "I hate you! I hate you!" Tina says, "You'll be selling to the small business market. He's your best account."