Credible Scientist Comic Strips
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Dogbert Consults Dogbert: "Every credible scientist on earth says your products harm the environment." "I recommend paying weasels to write articles casting doubt on the data." "Then eat the wrong kinds of foods and hope you die before the earth does. The Boss: "You're making me hungry!"
Boss: We're looking for a scientist who can be easily influenced by money to back our product claims. Lawyer: I'm perfect for that job. I have no ethnical boundaries whatsoever. Boss: But you won't try to con us, right? Lawyer: You can't have it both ways.
alice: i finished the data throughput tests, but the results are not credible because of a problem with the test. boss: does the non-credible data make us look good? alice: yes. boss: our name for that kind of data is "credible."
Boss: I fought with my boss to get you a raise but I lost. I'm always fighting for you behind the scenes. Alice: You're a terrific boss whenever there are no credible witnesses. Boss: Thank you.
Dilbert stands next to a device and Dogbert sits on a stool. Dilbert says, "My new invention will generate a solid particle bridge to permanently connect the earth to the moon!" Dogbert says, "Well, I'm no scientist, but won't that disrupt the earth's orbit and cause an ice age that will destroy all life on this planet?" Dilbert asks, "You think it needs a little warning label?" Dogbert replies, "Just don't let kids use it."
Dilbert: Yes? Scientist: I'm looking for my escaped lab rat. The trail leads to this house. Dilbert: Can't you just use another rat? Scientist: No. I'm on a very limited budget. Dilbert: What will you do if he dies? Scientist: CPR.
Scientist: Ahaaa! There's my runaway lab rat! I'd recognize little XP-39C2 anywhere! All is forgiven come back to your job at the lab. I love. Scientist: He was specially bred to have no will power. Lab Rat: Hold me.
Dilbert stands in front of the mirror tying his tie and Dogbert sits on the bed watching him. Dilbert says, "I joined the 'Scientist Anti-Defamation League.'" Dogbert asks, "What's that?" Dilbert replies, "They fight against the negative stereotypes of technical people that are often portrayed in the media." Dilbert's tie is wrapped around his body, arms and head. Dilbert says, "You broke my concentration."
A man stands at a podium and says into the microphone, "Welcome to the 'Scientist Anti-Defamation League' weekly meeting." The man continues, "Tonight's topic is the stereotype that we scientists have no social lives . . . But first . . ." The man asks, "Is Saturday night okay for our next meeting?" Someone says, "I'm free." Another person says, "No problem." Another person says, "Wide open."