Creepy Dude Comic Strips

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58 Results for Creepy Dude

View 1 - 10 results for creepy dude comic strips. Discover the best "Creepy Dude" comics from Dilbert.com.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cruelty, #managers & supervisors, #employment studies, #good boss, #getting riase, #less dysfunctional, #creepy dude, #business

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Catbert: Studies say employees prefer having a good boss over getting a raise. So instead of giving raises, pretend to be less dysfunctional. It's cheaper. Bwahahahaha!!! Boss: You're a creepy little dude.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #ventriloquism, #information overload, #libertarian, #taxidermist, #hand hole, #work, #like puppet, #creepy, #business

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Alice says, "His brain shut down from information overload, so I asked a libertarian taxidermist to stuff him." Alice says, "There's a hand hole in the back so we can work him like a puppet." Dilbert says, "It's sort of creepy." Alice says, "You'll get used to it."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #conversation, #worry, #complints, #creepy speech, #massage therapist, #rusty van

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Boss: Pete, I'm getting complaints that everything you say is creepy. Man: You seem tense. I should give you the number of my massage therapist, "Rubbin, Robin." Boss: You're doing it again. Man: I don't have an address because he works out of a rusty van.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #commerce, #fraternization, #creepy new vendor, #did laundry, #creepy, #made sandwhiches

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Dilbert: Our new vendor is creepy. He's trying to form a relationship with me. Man: I went to your house and did your laundry. You're welcome. Wally: How creepy could it be? Man: I made us sandwiches. You're out of mayo.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #anxiety, #death & dying, #could go wrong, #did go worng, #closer to death, #creepy

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Russell: This past week, everything that could go wrong did go wrong. Dilbert: Look on the bright side: you're seven days closer to death. Man: Hey! That's true! Dilbert: It's creepy when that works.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #being freightened, #creepy vibe, #leadership, #obsolete, #public speaking, #sense of urgency, #thread the needle, #tech platforms

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Dogbert: You need to imbue your staff with a sense of urgency. Boss: Gaaa!!! Our technology platforms are obsolete! Dogbert: Try it again with less panic. Boss: We're doomed, and yet, I am not the least bit worried. Dogbert: That one had a creepy vibe. A sense of urgency is halfway between being too frightened to act and too dumb to know what to do. Boss: Gaaa!!! Duh!!! Dogbert: You didn't quite thread the needle. Boss: Here comes leadership!

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #little, #doggie, #dude, #Dogbert, #driving, #school, #gruesome, #highway, #accidents, #intended, #helicopter

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A boy wearing a cap stands in front of Dogbert's desk and says, "Sign me up, little doggie-dude." Dogbert says, "We'll begin with a film about gruesome highway accidents. It is intended to shock you into driving safely." The boy sits in front of a television eating a snack. The boy asks, "Really? People get shocked by THIS?" Dogbert says, "I'll be following your car in a helicopter."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #fbi, #internet spam, #source, #fbi director, #dress up, #mammals, #creepy

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FBI. We have reason to believe that you're the source of all internet apam."I'm the director of the FBI. And you're both fired." "I'd heard that he likes to dress up as other mammals." "Creepy."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #all hands, #creepy hands, #conference room, #desk, #table

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How was the all hands meeting? "Creepy."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #work place violence, #prevention training, #violent emplyees, #identify, #beards, #creepy, #ineffective males, #widely disprected

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Tina says to the group, "Welcome to workplace violence prevention training." Tina continues, "How can we identify potentially violent employees?" Wally raises his hand excitedly yelling, "Ooh! Ooh!" Tina says, "Wally?" Wally answers, "Do they have beards?" Tina replies, "Um...no. That was a stupid answer." Tina says, "Violent employees are usually creepy, inefficiently males who are widely disrespected." Dilbert raises his hand and asks Tina, "May I change seats?"