Curly Haired Guys Comic Strips
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194 Results for Curly Haired Guys
View 1 - 10 results for curly haired guys comic strips. Discover the best "Curly Haired Guys" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday September 19,
1994
Tags #big tech show, #curly haired guys, #salmon, #spawning opportunites, #vast sea, #indistinct products, #trade show, #facial hair
Transcript
Dilbert: I'm going to the big technology show. Dogbert: what do you do there? Dilbert: I will wade though vast sea of mostly curly haired guys with facials hair and glasses and I will look at thousands of indistinct products, Dilbert: Its like salmon returning to it birthplace. Dogbert: But without the spawning opportunities,
Tuesday June 27,
1995
Tags #benchmark, #world class companies, #compare, #verbs, #nouns, #assign, #engineers, #field research, #pointy haired idioits
Transcript
The Boss says to Alice, "Alice, I want you to benchmark these world-class companies. Find out how we compare." Alice responds, "I'm betting they don't make verbs out of nouns. And I'll bet they don't assign engineers to do field research." Alice talks on the phone in her office. She asks, "Do you guys have any pointy-haired idiots running your place? . . . Would you like one?"
Saturday October 08,
2011
Tags #doctors, #employees, #medicines, #nice guys, #paid less, #aggressive jerks, #offer raise, #testosterone injections, #illegal, #dangerous, #unethical, #tiny income, #business
Transcript
Dilbert: Studies show that nice guys get paid less than aggressive jerks. Dogbert: Maybe you should offer your doctor 10% of your next raise if he gives you testosterone injections. Dilbert: That would be illegal, dangerous, and unethical. Dogbert: Said the man with the tiny income.
Thursday September 21,
1989
Tags #the boss, #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #Promotion, #criticism, #mule-stomped, #gopher, #bald guys
Transcript
A man at a desk says to Dilbert, "Well, Dilbert, you seem qualified for this promotion, but I have one concern. Since your work would be evaluated by many people . . ." The man asks, "Can you handle criticism?" Dilbert says, "Oh, easily. For example, your toupee looks like a mule-stomped gopher . . ." Back at home, Dilbert tells Dogbert, ". . . Turns out it was a trick question." Dogbert says, "Boy, you can't trust those bald guys."
Tuesday May 08,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #cool, #guys, #Women, #miss, #killing, #me, #trash, #dating, #love
Transcript
Dilbert thinks, "I've noticed that all the cool guys use gentle kidding with women. Women must like it." Dilbert walks up behind a woman and says, "Excuse me, miss, does your face hurt? It's killing me!" Dilbert giggles and snorts. Dilbert is stuffed upside down in a garbage can. Dilbert thinks, "The cool guys must hate it when this happens to them."
Saturday September 12,
1992
Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #Women, #write, #letters, #guys, #prison, #commit, #crime, #long, #improve, #social life, #personals, #ad, #resort
Transcript
Dilbert sits on the floor and leans against the couch and Dogbert sits on the couch. Dilbert asks, "Why do women write letters to guys who are in prison?" Dilbert continues, "Maybe if I commit a crime I can go to prison just long enough to improve my social life." Dogbert asks, "Why not do a personals ad instead?" Dilbert replies, "That's more of a last resort."
Friday May 13,
1994
Tags #dogbert consulting, #liver, #slab of liver, #harvard mba, #good debaters, #brains wrapped
Transcript
"When I hired the 'Dogbert Consulting Company' he said his consultants were so smart they had to wrap their brains around their torsos." "But that looks like a slab of liver." "This slab of liver has an MBA from Harvard, you pointy-haired fool!!" "Wow, you guys are good debaters."
Monday July 04,
1994
Tags #baywatch, #morale is low, #talk of mutiny, #project staus report, #death to boss, #pointy haired one
Transcript
Dilbert: Here's my daily project status report. Morale is low. There is talk of mutiny. we dream of quitting and becoming lifeguards on "Baywatch" Death to the pointy haired one. The Boss: Holy Cow! "Baywatch' is hiring??!
Tuesday July 04,
1995
Tags #guy in marketing, #alter dna, #structure, #animal, #weasel, #notice change, #marketing guys, #helix, #one helix
Transcript
Dilbert and Wally are eating lunch. Dilbert says, "I told a guy in marketing that I programmed his computer to alter his DNA structure." Wally laughs, "Hee Hee." Dilbert continues, "He thinks he'll turn into some kind of animal." Wally suggests, "Tell him you set it to 'weasel.' It'll take longer to notice any change." The guy in marketing says to Alice, "Tell me the truth, Alice, can Dilbert reprogram my DNA?" Alice responds, "Yeah. You marketing guys only have one helix."
Wednesday July 05,
1995
Tags #reprogrammed dna, #marketing guys, #heavens sake, #thank you, #power of suggestion
Transcript
As they walk down a corridor, Alice says to Dilbert, "Maybe you shouldn't have told Stan you programmed his DNA through the LAN." Alice continues, "Those marketing guys believe anything. They even believe market research, for heaven's sake." As Stan approaches, Alice says, "There's no telling what the power of suggestion might do." Stan, whose facial features now resemble those of a weasel, says to Dilbert, "Well, thank you very much."