Search Results for "dating"
Share December 31, 2014's comic on:
Dilbert: I got 9,752 responses on this dating site and I haven't even completed my profile. All I said is that I'm six feet tall, I have hair and a job. Meanwhile, everywhere: Women: Hair... height... job! Triple threat!
Share January 05, 2015's comic on:
Woman: Have you been dating a lot? Dilbert: I call it A-B testing. I go on dates and then compare the analytics to see who I click with most.Woman: What exactly are you measuring? Dilbert: Asks too many questions.
Share May 11, 2016's comic on:
Catbert: Rumor has it that you are dating a co-worker named Loud Howard. Company policy requires you to register your lustful feelings with our legal department. Lawyer: Okay, I think we have you covered, but the stapling phase will sting a little.
Share October 06, 2017's comic on:
CEO: I love this dating app. Wally: I thought you were married. CEO: I'm just looking. What's the worst thing that could happen? CEO: Hey, what's my wife doing on here? Wally: Your wife/?? That's my girlfriend!
Share March 09, 2012's comic on:
Dilbert: I've got two good prospects on this dating site. One is addicted to Facebook and the other is addicted to prescription pain meds. Dogbert: Sort of a tie. Dilbert: But only one of them is likely to make eye contact.
Share April 17, 1989's comic on:
Dilbert and Dogbert sit outdoors . Dilbert is holding an ice cream cone. Dilbert says, "I can remember when these were only fifteen cents." Dilbert continues, "But I'm really dating myself now . . ." Dogbert says, "Well, it's not as if anybody else would date you."
Share June 16, 1989's comic on:
Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dogbert asks, "Did you ever think how lucky people are that their eyes are located on their heads?" Dogbert continues, "Suppose your eyes were on your ankles; you wouldn't be able to drive a car." Dilbert leaves. Dogbert continues, "Without cars, dating would be impossible. No dating, then no marriage. Soon the species would be extinct."
Share November 16, 1990's comic on:
Share November 13, 1991's comic on:
Dilbert and Dogbert sit at the table. Dogbert says, "We have to approach your dating problem logically." Dogbert continues, "We'll begin by writing down all of the qualities you want in a girlfriend." Much later, Dogbert is still writing and there are stacks of paper on the table. Dilbert says, ". . . And she must be a ballerina." Dogbert says, "My paw is cramping."
Share June 02, 1992's comic on:
Dilbert and Dogbert sit at the desk watching the video phone. Dilbert says, "This video phone will be a big help for dating." Dilbert continues, "This way I can weed out the unattractive prospects in seconds." Dogbert asks, "Isn't there a camera on your end too?" Dilbert replies, "No system is perfect."