Day At Work Comic Strips
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The Boss: If you want to succeed, you have to work hard every single day for years. Dilbert: That sounds awful. You just talked me out of wanting to succeed. Did you work that hard to get where you are? The Boss: Next topic!
Ted: The committee decided that the file naming convention will start with the date, in the order of month, year, day... then a space, then the temperature at the airport, and the hat size of the nearest squirrel. To be perfectly honest, it was a long meeting and we probably didn't do our best work toward the end.
An employee says to the Boss, "I found a typo in the budget spreadsheet . . . It's too late to fix it." The man continues, "We transferred one job to another group but accidentally kept the money and headcount." The Boss tells another man, ". . . So, we still pay you but you aren't allowed to do work." The man thinks, "This is the happiest day of my life."
Dilbert: I spent the entire day getting new assignments which left no time to actually work on anything. Dilbert: Tomorrow I'll spend the entire day explaining why I didn't finish yesterdays work. Sometimes I don't know the difference between me and hamster on a wheel. Dogbert: Hamsters dont depress me.
"I don't know how you do it. You work all day and now you take classes at night." "ZZZ" "It's hard, but you're gaining knowledge that couldn't be obtained any other way." "Whump" "Hey! I can hold eleven 'cheerios' in my nose!" "And it's knowledge you can apply."
Dogbert stands at Dilbert's desk and Dilbert sits next to him. Alice asks, "Hey, what's Dogbert doing here?" Dilbert replies, "This is 'Bring Your Dog to Work Day.'" Alice says, "There's no such thing." Dogbert works at the desk and says, "I'm through the security firewall and into the personnel records." Dilbert looks angry and says, "We need to talk."
Tags #share accomplishments, #created dcoument, #desktop publishing, #two day class, #digitized photos, #color highlights, #multi column, #clip art, #icons, #visual mosaic, #add topic, #some content, #enjoy work
The Boss, Dilbert, Wally and Alice sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "Let's go around the table and share our accomplishments." Dilbert says, "I created a document this week." Dilbert continues, "But THIS is no ordinary document!" Dilbert explains, "I bought a $500 desktop publishing program and took a two-day class to learn it." Dilbert continues, "I incorporated digitized photos and color highlights in a multi-column page layout!" Dilbert continues, "Clip-art icons are sprinkled liberally around the page to form a visual mosaic!" Dilbert continues, "Next week - God willing - I'll add a topic and some content." The Boss says, "Do you remember when I said you should enjoy your work? I didn't mean it." Dilbert says, "Ooh."
The feature creep Creep: Is it too late to give our product a low battery indicator? Dilbert: Id have to work night and day for a month! My health would decline and Id miss all my objectives! Creep: I jus realized that other peoples problems make me all warm inside.