Decides Whats Rude Comic Strips
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459 Results for Decides Whats Rude
View 1 - 10 results for decides whats rude comic strips. Discover the best "Decides Whats Rude" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday August 18,
2002
Tags #pet peeve, #cellphones, #restaurants, #public, #talk louder, #just rude, #decides whats rude, #commitee, #common sense, #drive through, #using microphone
Transcript
Dilbert, Dogbert, and a woman are walking outside. The woman says, "My pet peeve is when people use their cell phones in restaurants." Dilbert asks, "Why? Do they talk louder than the other people in the restaurant?" The woman responds, "No. It's just rude." Dilbert asks, "Who decides what is rude? Is there a committee?" The woman responds, "It's common sense. You're not supposed to talk into electronic gadgets at a restaurant." Dilbert asks, "What about a drive-through place? Is it okay to order your food using the microphone?" The woman is visibly frustrated. Dogbert answers his cell phone, "Yello." Dogbert says into his cell phone, "Hi, Ratbert... Yeh, he made the mistake of talking... The goodnight kiss is a definite no-go." Dogbert continues into the phone, "No, it's not awkward, but thanks for asking."
Sunday December 29,
2019
Searching On A Phone
Tags #office workers, #communication, #phone, #protocol, #task, #rude, #technology, #insult, #fake
Transcript
tina: i have something funny to show you. just give me a minute to find it on my phone. dilbert thinking: what's the protocol in this situation? should i just sit here and stare at her pawing at her phone? i can't talk because she's focused on her task. and it would be rude to walk away. would it be an insult to look at my own phone and mentally check out from this useless interaction? tina: ah! i found it! dilbert: okay, good. tina: wait, that's not the right one. dilbert: is this why people fake their own deaths?
Wednesday February 09,
2011
Tags #mobile (cell) phones, #text message, #auto correction feature, #weather holds, #rude fresco, #auto correction, #feature
Transcript
Wally says, "I got your text message and I burped the grope plow armistice as you requested." Dilbert says, "Maybe you should turn off the auto-correction feature on your phone." Wally says, "If the weather holds, I'll flail the rude fresco tomorrow."
Friday May 26,
1989
Tags #door, #fall, #falling, #rude, #stairs
Transcript
Dilbert walks through a door and thinks, "I hate this: somebody is just far enough behind me that it would be awkward to hold the door, but rude to let it swing." Dilbert walks away thinking, "I'll just pick up the pace and act like I don't notice anybody behind me." The door hits the person behind him. The person screams and falls down the stairs. Dilbert thinks, "Doors at the tops of stairs are the worst."
Thursday July 05,
2012
Tags #coffee & tea, #late, #coffee safety, #whats real, #trip, #coffee in face
Transcript
Wally: Don't start. I'm late for the mandatory coffee safety training. I'd better run. Hunh! Boss: I can't tell what's real anymore.
Thursday March 09,
1995
Tags #thought leaders, #whats worng, #no thoughts, #cloud, #no ideas, #blank head bos
Transcript
Dilbert, Wally, Alice, the Boss and another worker sit around a conference table. The Boss says, "From now on, the managers at my level will be called 'thought leaders.'" Dilbert and Wally stare at him in amazement. Dilbert asks Wally, "What's wrong with this picture?" The Boss's thoughts are shown to be empty.
Saturday October 05,
1996
Tags #both dead, #doing nothing, #hundred years, #spread joy, #whats funny, #working hard, #ratbert, #Dilbert
Transcript
Ratbert walks across Dilbert's desk and says, "You know what's funny? I'll tell you." Ratbert continues, "You're working hard. I'm doing nothing. In a hundred years we'll both be dead." Dilbert says angrily, "You might not need to wait that long." Ratbert says as he walks away, "I think I'll spread some joy over this way."
Wednesday July 07,
1999
Tags #analysis disagrees, #intuition, #modems, #satan, #misundertsood, #whats his face
Transcript
Dilbert stand in the boss office. The boss says, "Your analysis disagrees with my intuition." Dilbert says, "Your intuition also told you the internet would be replaced with modems... whatever that means." The boss says, "I'm misunderstood, just like... um.. what's his face." Dilert says, "Satan?"
Friday November 26,
1999
Tags #the turnaround ceo, #mole, #fire, #affect revenue, #outsource everything, #one smart employee, #risk, #rude
Transcript
The Turnaround CEO The devilish looking CEO asks Dilbert, "Tell me, mole, who can I fire without affecting revenue?" Dilbert replies, "In theory, you could outsource everything and run the company with one smart employee." Dilbert continues, "And at the risk of sounding rude, only one of us knew that."
Saturday June 24,
2000
Tags #worst date ever, #whats on ground, #bends over, #check out ass, #not so good
Transcript
Ming and Dilbert are walking together as Ming talks on her cell phone. "Yeah, I'm having the worst date ever. I'll check." Ming asks Dilbert, "What's that on the ground? It looks interesting?" Dilbert bends down tolook. Ming begins talking on her cell phone again. "Not so good."