Defeat Prurpose Comic Strips
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7 Results for Defeat Prurpose
View 1 - 7 results for defeat prurpose comic strips. Discover the best "Defeat Prurpose" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday April 05,
1999
Tags #audit, #non conforming documents, #defeat prurpose, #voluntary audit, #torch cars
Transcript
The boss, Wally and Dilbert sit at the conference table. The boss says, "Our annnual ISO 9000 audit is next week." The boss says, "We can pass the audit if we put all our non-conforming documents in the trucks of our cars." Wally says, "Doesn't that defeat the purpose of a voluntary audit?" The boss says, "And then torch the cars."
Saturday June 30,
2007
Tags #career counselor, #flower arranging, #billionaire, #work hard, #defeat purpose, #no work, #doesn't want to work
Transcript
Dogbert, career counselor "What would you like to do with your degree in...flower arranging?" "I'd like to be a billionaire." "Are you willing to work hard?" "That would sort of defeat the purpose."
Friday November 09,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #bank, #ethel, #hand, #combat, #serious, #automated, #teller, #machine, #encouraging
Transcript
Dilbert stands at a teller window at the Bank of Ethel. The teller says, "I cannot allow this withdrawal . . ." The woman continues, "Unless you defeat me in hand to hand combat." Dilbert arrives at home with a bandage on his head and his arm in a sling. Dilbert tells Dogbert, "They seem pretty serious about encouraging the use of their automated teller machines."
Sunday July 02,
2000
Tags #system failures, #data aren't actionable, #no practical value, #crime, #guilty, #feel awkward, #incident
Transcript
Ted says to Dilbert and Wally, "We had fifteen system failures with the previous software." Dilbert says to Ted, "Your data aren't actionable." Ted replies, "What?" Dilbert continues, "Your presentation has no practical walue." Ted throws his hands in the air in defeat and says to Dilbert, "Well, if that's suddenly a crime then call me guilty!" Wally says, "Now the meeting feels awkward can we go back to acting interested?" Dilbert replies, "I guess." Ted says, "Fine. Let's put this ugly incident behind us."
Tuesday October 28,
2014
Tags #3 months, #multiple projects, #multitasking, #projects, #waiting, #work ethic, #patience
Transcript
Coworker: Three months. That's how long I have been waiting for you to do your part of the project. Wally: Perhaps you don't realize how many projects I'm on. Coworker: Have you done any work for the other projects? Wally: That would defeat the point of having multiple projects.
Sunday August 09,
2015
Tags #employee, #Advice, #health, #wellness, #money, #cost, #work ethic, #fatigue, #Family, #marriage, #support, #insult, #relationships
Transcript
Dilbert: The long hours of work are taking a toll on my body. Can I take some time off for my health? Boss; That would defeat the whole point of being an employee. You are supposed to be trading your health and happiness for money. Then you give that money to your family and watch them spend it while you eat yourself to death. It's a circle of life sort of thing. Dilbert: I'm not married. Boss: Loser.
Saturday May 02,
2020
Carol Hoards
Tags #business, #health, #office supplies, #copy paper, #hoarding, #shortage, #coronavirus
Transcript
dilbert wearing face mask: we're running low on copier paper. carol wearing face mask: i know. i hoarded it all at my house when someone said we might have a shortage. dilbert: can you bring some of it back? carol: that would defeat the point of hoarding.