Desert And Seek Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

21 Results for Desert And Seek

View 1 - 10 results for desert and seek comic strips. Discover the best "Desert And Seek" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 26, 1995's comic on:

Tags #saint dogbert, #mediate, #dispute, #computers, #desert and seek, #enlightenment, #path of computing, #plan springs, #endorsement, #contract, #end of line

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "I asked Saint Dogbert to mediate our dispute over what kind of computers are allowed here." Dogbert stands behind him wearing a miter and holding a scepter. Looking down from the top of a file cabinet, Dogbert raises his arms and says, "I shall go to the desert and seek enlightenment. When I return I will reveal the true path of computing." The caption says, "Palm Springs." Dogbert is at a table with a man holding a suitcase full of money. Behind the man is a woman with a sack of money. Dogbert says to the man, "You call this an endorsement contract?! Go to the end of the line!"

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 17, 1994's comic on:

Tags #forgiveness, #seek permission, #personal risk, #next reorganization, #sound stupid, #ask permission

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: "I say it's easier to ask forgiveness than to ask permission." TED : "I say it's better to seek permission, thus delaying your personal risk until it all becomes moot in the next reorganization." Wally: "That makes mine sound kinda stupid." TED: "Get over it."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 07, 1994's comic on:

Tags #boss made pass, #cat ate ring, #family in coma, #irs audit, #seek relief, #woes, #anti woe cologne

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: I'm going to seek relief from my many woes by sharing them with you. My entire family is in a coma....The cat ate my wedding ring,,,,The IRS is auditing us....my boss made a pass at me. It isn't working, you aren't absorbing my woes. Dilbert: Im wearing into woe cologne.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 01, 1994's comic on:

Tags #diveristy, #sensitivity training, #seek better understanding, #dumpy white guy section

View Transcript

Transcript

"I can't believe we have to go to 'diversity sensitivity' training." "Wally, I don't see how it could be bad to seek a better understanding of others." "Uh-oh." "Take a seat in the 'dumpy white guy section'. I'm ready to start."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 08, 1996's comic on:

Tags #career advice, #career counselor, #seek advice, #sounds lazy, #unhelpful, #work hard, #insecure people, #self relaint

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits on the bed watching Dilbert tie his tie. Dogbert says, "I'm going to try my paw at being a career counselor." Dogbert continues, "Insecure people will seek my advice and I'll tell them to be more self-reliant." Dilbert says, "That sounds lazy and unhelpful." Dogbert asks, "Would you want career advice from somebody who has to work hard?"

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 30, 1996's comic on:

Tags #Catbert, #evil, #hr dircetor, #hire programmer, #project team, #first seek candidates, #nine qualified, #sock puppet, #policies, #designed, #sole purpose, #saditic tendencies

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice says to Catbert, "I need to hire a programmer for my project team." Catbert says, "Our policy is to first seek candidates from within the company. If none is qualified, you must use a sock puppet." Alice asks, "How many of your policies are designed for the sole purpose of satisfying your sadistic tendencies?" Catbert replies, "All of them. Some are just more obvious."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 07, 1998's comic on:

Tags #promise customers, #product not yet designed, #motto, #ask forgiveness, #seek permission, #design work

View Transcript

Transcript

Bob tells Alice and Dilbert, "Maybe it was wrong to promise our customers a product that hasn't been designed yet." Bob says, "But our motto in marketing is, "'It's better to ask for forgiveness than to seek permission.'" Alice holds Bob over the roof. He is dangling. Dilbert says, "Your motto needs some design work too."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 31, 2004's comic on:

Tags #check, #forgiveness, #philosophy, #rip out heart, #seek forgiveness, #ask permission, #internet, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: Gaaa!!! How could you do this without checking with me??!! My philosophy is that its better to seek forgiveness than to ask for permission. Dilbert: did he say you could rip out hi heart and sell it on the internet? Alice: Kinda.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 04, 2006's comic on:

Tags #team building exercise, #security gurad, #middle of desert, #leave you there

View Transcript

Transcript

"Ted, I'm sending you on a team-building exercise." "A security guard will drive you to the middle of the desert and leave you there!" "And then the team will rescue me?" "Sure."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 05, 1989's comic on:

Tags #joke telling, #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #beer, #cactus, #timing, #jokes

View Transcript

Transcript

The caption says, "Dilbert demonstrates the art of joke telling." Dilbert and Dogbert sit on chairs across from each other. Dilbert says, ". . . So the first guy orders a beer and a cactus . . ." The caption says, "A good joke teller will seek to establish a pattern." Dilbert continues, ". . . Then the second guy . . . Heh, heh . . . Orders a beer and a cactus . . ." The caption says, "Tomorrow's lesson: timing." Dilbert continues, ". . . So then the seventy-third guy comes in . . ." Dogbert is asleep.