Distorted View Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

46 Results for Distorted View

View 1 - 10 results for distorted view comic strips. Discover the best "Distorted View" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 03, 1994's comic on:


Tags #imagine, #being a woman, #men in training, #people acknowledge, #can't find keys, #blouse falls off, #distorted view, #misogyny

View Transcript

Transcript

"In this sensitivity excercise, close your eyes and imagine how it feels to be a woman." "People acknowledge my existence. They smile for no reason and hold hte door open. I'm ...I'm popular." "I can't find my keys." "I'm never going back. I can't. I won't." "My blouse falls to the floor..." "Break! Break!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 09, 1994's comic on:


Tags #pile binders, #have view, #cubicle walls, #everyone binders

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally stacks binders on his desk chair and tells Dilbert, ". . . And if I pile enough binders on my chair I'll have a window view!" Wally stands on his chair and looks over the cubicle wall. Dilbert thinks as he walks away, "I've got to try that." The Boss hands Ted a binder and says, "Wow! I've never seen so much interest in our business plan!" Ted asks, "Can I have two?" Behind them, Dilbert, Wally and their co-workers stand on their chairs looking out of their cubicles.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 22, 1996's comic on:


Tags #new smoking habit, #teeth turned yellow, #social outcast, #going broke, #house burned down, #going to quit, #long term view

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice asks Wally, "How do you like your new smoking habit?" Wally replies, "My teeth turned yellow, my breath is putrid, I'm a social outcast, I'm going broke, and my house burned down." Alice asks, "So you're going to quit?" Wally replies, "No, I'm trying to take a long term view of it."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 05, 1997's comic on:


Tags #blueprints, #new cubicle, #window view, #hot by window, #breeze

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert holds his box of stuff and Wally holds the office floorplan. Wally says, "According to the blueprints, your new cubicle has a support beam in it." Dilbert stands in his cubicle which is taken up mostly by a huge support beam. He thinks, "At least I have a window view." At home, Dilbert looks disheveled and sweats. He says, "It's one hundred-eight degrees by the window but at least there's a breeze from the people who walk by and laugh." Dogbert sits on the arm of the couch and says, "Don't let me slow your search for someone who's interested."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 28, 2000's comic on:


Tags #demons possessed, #view websites, #unspeakable abominations, #approve the purchase

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says to the Boss, "Demons have possessed my PC. They force me to view websites of unspeakable abominations." Wally continues, "The only solution is for you to approve the purchase of a new PC for me." Dilbert approaches Wally, now sitting at his computer and asks, "How are the unspeakable abominations today?" Wally replies, "Much faster."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 22, 2003's comic on:


Tags #disappointing people, #meeting start late, #answer is misleading, #deadline ignored, #work is shoddy, #empthy, #blocking view of wall

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: "Lately, every person I deal with seems to disappoint me." Dilbert: "Every meeting starts late, every answer is misleading, every deadline is ignored, and all work is shoddily done." DIlbert: "I guess what I'm saying is that today I need some empathy." Dogbert: "You are totally blocking my view of the wall."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 22, 2003's comic on:


Tags #lead odg, #view never changes, #look at face, #imlying, #insightful analogy

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss: "Remember, if you're not the lead dog, the view never changes." Carol: "I'm not the lead dog, and I have to look at your face all day. The Boss: "What are you implying?" Carol: "I was admiring your insightful analogy."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 22, 2003's comic on:


Tags #hapy, #spacious offcie, #ocean view, #workplace, #personalized environemnt, #brad pitt

View Transcript

Transcript

"Who's today's guest cartoonist?" Dilbert: "I'm so happy in my new spacious office with an ocean view." "Finally I have the workplace I've always dreamed of." Wally: "The personalized environment headset works, sir." The boss: "Brad Pitt! Shouldn't you put a shirt on?" ANSER: GO TO DILBERT.COM

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 20, 2004's comic on:


Tags #backs up, #fake news, #lake view, #potential fire place, #rains, #real estate charlatan, #seasonal skylight, #sweras, #turning bad into good, #well written

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert the real estate agent "When it rains the sewer backs up and covers the driveway." "Lake view." "Every spring rabid squirrels rip off huge chunks of the roof to look for food." "Seasonal skylight." "The dry brush behind the house is a fire hazard." "Potential, fireplace."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 07, 2012's comic on:


Tags #twins, #meeting, #clone, #cooler clone, #clear view, #engine purr, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: Is it awkward being in the same meeting as a cooler version of yourself? Scoot back so I can get a clear view. This guy really makes my engine purr. A little more.