Disturbing Comic Strips
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View 1 - 10 results for disturbing comic strips. Discover the best "Disturbing" comics from Dilbert.com.
Dilbert is carrying-out a presentation. He is standing in front of the attendees, next to a diagram. He says: "I'd like to start with a diagram." He points at the diagram and explains: "It's a bunch of shapes connected by lines." He continues: "Now I will say some impressive words." He says: "Synchronized Incremental Digital Integrated Dynamic E-Commerce Space." He asks: "Any questions?" One of the attendees raises his hand and asks: "May I have a copy of your presentation?" Dilbert stands alone, surrounded by white space and silence. He arrives home and tells Dogbert: "The results of my experiment are disturbing."
A woman says, "How long have you been addicted to ogling online job postings?" Alice says, "It started when I realized my current job is like a dung beetle trying to mate with an epileptic cow." The woman says, "That imagery is disturbing." Alice says, "I know, right?"
"I have some disturbing news." "We outsourced our customer-service function to India a few years ago." "So?" "Apparently, they subcontracted the job to Mexico." "Then Mexico subcontracted to Vietnam, who subcontracted to the Philippines.." "..Who subcontracted it to us." "It turns out that we're the lowest-cost provider because we lie about our hold times." "In summary, we pay ourselves to hose ourselves." "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" "We should raise our prices?"
dogbert: my audit of your company has uncovered many disturbing things. for example, did you know that the sales department holds cockfights on the third floor every tuesday? boss: why have i never been invited? dogbert: you're not a rooster.
Tina: Wally, do you want to go to lunch? Wally: No, thanks. I"m a digisexual now. Tina: What: Wally: I'm no longer attracted to people. I only like technology. People creep me out. You're basically a delivery system for viruses, germs, and unreasonable favor requests. I'm willing to take a picture of you, but that's as far as I'll go. Tina: This is the most disturbing conversation I've ever had. Wally: Thank goodness for Photoshop.
Dilbert stands behind a man with an eye patch who is working on his computer. The man says, "My theory is that a computer interface should hurt the user." The man continues, "So I designed some new sounds into our product. We've got 'sound of puking,' 'fingernails on blackboard' and 'bird hitting window.'" Dilbert looks ill. The man continues, "But suppose the user does something WRONG. Then we have the sound of a puking bird hitting a blackboard." Dilbert falls down.
The Boss says to Alice, "Alice, I've noticed a distrubing pattern. Your solutions to problems are always the things you try last." Alice says, "With all due respect, are you using your skull to store old rags or what?" The Boss says to Alice as she leaves her office, "It's a good thing you said, 'With all due respect.'" Alice rols her eyes.
Asok: I don't like the looks of this. BUREACRACY ASOK: I only want to correct a small payroll error. Can you help me? Troll: does it help if I glare ar you for disturbing my lunch?
A disturbing number of you have requested the return of Loud Howard. "Loud Howard is one-dimensional. There is nothing clever or insightful about him. He is simply loud." "It is a mystery why anyone would want more of this guy." "THEY LOVE ME!!!"