Divided Comic Strips
Search Filters
Year
- 2021
- 2020
- 2019
- 2018
- 2017
- 2016
- 2015
- 2014
- 2013
- 2012
- 2011
- 2010
- 2009
- 2008
- 2007
- 2006
- 2005
- 2004
- 2003
- 2002
- 2001
- 2000
- 1999
- 1998
- 1997
- 1996
- 1995
- 1994
- 1993
- 1992
- 1991
- 1990
- 1989
Character
5 Results for Divided
View 1 - 5 results for divided comic strips. Discover the best "Divided" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday February 24,
1992
Tags #Dogbert, #president, #united states, #charisma, #unify, #divided, #Political, #party, #democrat, #communist
Transcript
Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert stands on the hassock. Dogbert says, "I've decided to run for President of the United States." Dogbert continues, "I'm hoping my charisma will unify a divided political party." Dilbert asks, "You're running as a Democrat?" Dogbert replies, "No, Communist. I want to have a chance."
Top Dilbert Searches
marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Tuesday October 01,
1996
Tags #audit, #documented procedures, #divided, #two groups, #unethical, #unprodcutive, #train department, #lie to auditor, #document, #inane prcedures
Transcript
The Boss, Wally and Dilbert sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "We'll be having an ISO 9000 audit soon. They'll check to see if we follow our own documented procedures for everything we do." The Boss continues, "I've divided our preparation tasks into two groups: unethical and unproductive." Wally tells Dilbert, "I'll train our department to lie to the auditor. You can document our inane procedures." Dilbert replies, "No fair. You did unethical last time too!"
Thursday October 13,
1994
Tags #Dogbert, #speech, #have and have nots, #dumb ones, #cavemans, #unevolved
Transcript
Dogbert the futurist Dogebert: Society will become divided into technology "haves" and "have nots" Eventually the two groups will take different evolutionary paths. Then, as now, the "have nots" will be policy makers. Caveman: Oog mission statement
Thursday March 18,
2004
Tags #trolls, #hell, #payroll system, #automated sadistic, #phone system, #tech support, #complicated
Transcript
Asok: Are you the troll that handles our payroll system? I have a problem. Troll: problems are handled by our automated sadistic phone system. ASOK: For tech support, press the exact value of 22 divided by 7
Sunday September 30,
2007
Tags #carpet fishing, #devised a game, #computer, #string, #randomly picks location, #hooked fish marlin, #salmon, #killing time, #technology
Transcript
Alice: "What are you doing?" Dilbert: "Carpet fishing." "It's a sport I invented." "I divided the carpet in my cubicle into a numbered grid." "Then I wrote a computer program that randomly picks a carpet location and a type of fish about once an hour." "If it picks the carpet location where I happen to be dangling this string, it means I hooked a fish." "Yesterday I caught a marlin." "Did you come here for some reason other than to spoil the salmon run?"