Drive Boss Nuts Comic Strips
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1000 Results for Drive Boss Nuts
View 1 - 10 results for drive boss nuts comic strips. Discover the best "Drive Boss Nuts" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday May 17,
2000
Tags #alice date, #cafe, #dinner date, #drive boss nuts, #honesty, #indifference arouses, #using you, #vp and engineer
Transcript
VP: Alice, maybe we shouldn't date, Im a Vp and you're an engineer in my division. Alice: Sheesh, Get over yourself. IM just using you to drive my boss nuts, VP: Your indifference arouses me! I will make you mine! Alice: VPs
Thursday September 20,
2001
Tags #music in offcie, #can't concentrate, #turn it down, #drive you nuts, #complain, #cubicles, #separation, #desks
Transcript
Dilbert leans over the cubicle wall and says, "Could you turn off the music? I can't concentrate" to the coworker next to him. The coworker replies, "How about if I turn it down to a level where it still drives you nuts but you're too shy to complain a second time?" Dilbert says, "Thank you." The coworker says, "It might creep up over time."
Tuesday November 24,
1998
Tags #magnets, #big impact, #erased hard drive, #feeling healthy, #boss with magnets, #joints
Transcript
The Boss walks up to Dilbert with magnets all over his body. The Boss says, "I'm feeling much healthier since I strapped all of these magnets to my body." Dilbert says, "That's fascinating. You should show them to Wally. It would have a big impact on him." The boss says, "Okay." From off-panel Wally screams, "You erased my #%!!* hard drive!!"
Monday December 04,
2017
Boss Finds A Thumb Drive
Tags #computers, #infection, #malware, #obliviousness, #virus, #hacker, #hacking
Transcript
Boss: I found a thumb drive on the sidewalk. It must be my lucky day. It's like free money! Dilbert: Can free money infect our network, too? Boss: You worry too much. Dilbert: If you need me, I'll be selling all of my company stock.
Friday May 20,
2011
Tags #computers & peripherals, #language, #no longer undertsnd, #employees, #to of touch, #technology, #gravitons, #warp drive, #rebalanced, #subspace responders, #business
Transcript
Boss: I no longer understand anything my employees say. I must be so out of touch with technology that I don't even recognize the words. Wally: I flushed the gravitons out of the warp drive and rebalanced the subspace responders.
Thursday August 15,
1991
Tags #Dogbert, #car, #salesman, #woman, #old, #steal, #purse, #drive, #foot, #boss, #convince, #first born, #son, #relatives
Transcript
Dogbert says to a customer, "I asked the boss to sell it at your price." Dogbert continues, "He told me to drive over your foot and steal your purse." Dogbert continues, "Buy maybe I can convince him to take your first-born son instead." The woman says, "He IS my first-born son!!"
Tuesday March 29,
1994
Tags #commercially viable, #hard drive, #installed software, #tail, #zimbu, #monkey, #animals
Transcript
The Boss: Well, well, It looks like Zumbu has designed another commercially viable product using only his tail. Dilbert: I could have done that....If I hadn't erased my hard drive when I installed my security software. I don't produce much, but its very secure. Monkey: Heres another one.
Monday November 07,
1994
Tags #dignity, #creativity, #precious earth, #blood drive, #three pint minimum
Transcript
The Boss, Wally, Dilbert, Alice and a man sit at a conference table. The man says, "This job has taken my dignity, my self-esteem, my creativity and my precious time on this earth." The man continues, "You've taken all I have! There's nothing left to give!!!" The Boss says, "The blood drive is next week. This year it's mandatory . . . And a three-pint minimum."
Tuesday October 31,
1995
Tags #focus core bsuiness, #core business change, #misdirected failure, #car gets flat, #rotate tires, #drive home
Transcript
Wally says to the Boss, "I don't understand how the new reorganization will help us 'focus on our core business.'" Wally continues, "Did our core business change? Or are you saying that EVERY reorg prior to this was a misdirected failure?" The Boss asks hypothetically, "Wally, when a car gets a flat tire, what do you do?" Wally answers, "Well, if I'm you, I rotate the tires and drive home."
Tuesday January 09,
1996
Tags #new boss is posessed, #evil force, #one solution, #drive stake, #heart, #be cruel, #borrow pen, #wimpy retractable
Transcript
Dilbert and Alice approach Dogbert who is sitting on a desk. Dilbert says, "My new boss is possessed by an evil force. We need your advice, Dogbert." Dogbert responds, "There is only one solution. You must drive a stake through his heart." Dilbert says, "There's no way we could be so cruel!!" Alice holds up a pen and says, "Can I borrow your pen? All I have is this wimpy retractable."