Eat Card Comic Strips
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262 Results for Eat Card
View 1 - 10 results for eat card comic strips. Discover the best "Eat Card" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday March 01,
2005
Tags #elbonian culture class, #elbonian businessman, #Card, #eat card, #spit, #dueling yak bones
Transcript
Elbonian Culture Class "When an Elbonian businessman gives you his card...",br>"Crumple it up and put it in your mouth. Chew it slowly then spit it toward his forehead." "This leads me to my next topic: Dueling with Yak bones."
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Friday August 12,
2011
Tags #business ethics, #stock market, #hedge fund, #million dollars, #insider trading, #algorithm, #winning trades, #create algorithm, #eat fiber, #money
Transcript
Dogbert: I'll pay you a million dollars a year to work at my hedge fund. I'll do the insider trading and you pretend you created an algorithm that makes winning trades. Dilbert: What if I actually create the algorithm? Dogbert: Sure, and maybe you can eat fiber and make gold, too.
Friday October 07,
2011
Tags #inventions, #thinking, #creative, #teacher, #business card, #ideationista, #education
Transcript
Boss: I hired Ken to teach us how to be more creative. According to his business card, his title is "ideationista." Ken: That was some of my best work.
Thursday November 03,
2011
Tags #depression (mental state), #despair, #ugly partment, #two ugly roomates, #ugly bus, #ugly building, #ugly cubicle, #eat lunch
Transcript
Asok: I live in an ugly apartment with two ugly roommates. Each workday I take an ugly bus to an ugly building and spend the entire day in my ugly cubicle. Dilbert: At least you get to eat lunch with us. Asok: I've said too much.
Wednesday August 16,
1989
Tags #Dogbert, #critics, #aliens, #eat, #bug, #reptilian, #gerbil, #game show, #visionary, #television
Transcript
Dogbert sits on a pillow listening to a radio news broadcast. The newscaster says, "Critics continued their accusations that the management of Megaslime Corporation is made up of reptilian aliens from another planet." The newscaster continues, "A company spokesman offered to eat a bug and not enjoy it, thus proving they are not reptilian." The newscaster continues, "Critics responded by insisting on a live gerbil instead of a bug. Merv Griffin announced that he would launch a new game show based on the concept." Dogbert says, "The man is a visionary."
Thursday March 22,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #blind date, #biggest, #woman, #chance, #financially, #surviving, #dinner, #eat, #starch, #pasta, #banned, #life
Transcript
The caption says, "Dilbert greets his blind date." Dilbert thinks, "This is the biggest woman I've ever seen." Dilbert says, "Uh . . . Hi." Dilbert thinks, "I have only one chance of financially surviving dinner." The woman says, "Hi." Dilbert says, "Say . . . Why don't we go to the 'All-you-can-eat House of Starch and Pasta?'" The woman replies, "Can't . . . Banned for life."
Tuesday November 06,
1990
Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #job, #steal, #Card, #i.d., #continued, #hate, #it, #friend
Transcript
Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I got fired." Dilbert sits on the floor hugging his knees and says, "The crook who robbed our house used my company I.D. card to steal my job too." Dilbert sits in the dark and says, "All I have is you, my friend. Dogbert?" The caption says, "(Don't you hate it when they say) Continued."
Monday November 12,
1990
Tuesday December 25,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #lab, #model, #automatic, #dentures, #program, #eat, #meat, #loaf, #asleep, #boss, #johnson
Transcript
Dilbert and the Boss stand in the laboratory. Dilbert says, "This is the first lab model of automatic dentures." Dilbert explains, "You can program them to eat a meat loaf for you while you sleep . . . Quite a little time saver." Inside the lab, the Boss asks, "Weren't you working with Johnson?" Dilbert replies, "Ooh . . . Bad news about Johnson, sir."
Wednesday March 27,
1991
Tags #Dogbert, #mutt, #chew, #assignment, #homework, #dog, #eat
Transcript
A boy walks up behind Dogbert and yells, "Yo! Mutt!!" The boy holds out a piece of paper and continues, "I need an excuse for not doing my homework. Chew on this assignment sheet and I'll say 'A dog ate it.'" The boy sits in a classroom desk and says, "A dog made me eat it." The boy's clothes are ripped and his face is dirty.