Eat Catepillar Comic Strips
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193 Results for Eat Catepillar
View 1 - 10 results for eat catepillar comic strips. Discover the best "Eat Catepillar" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday December 19,
1999
Tags #laptop computer, #order for me, #tech seminar, #hawaii, #sign up, #four day weekend, #eat catepillar, #recognize pattern, #copies everything, #boss
Transcript
Susan is standing in front of the boss who is sittind at his desk. Susan says: "May I get a laptop computer?" The boss answers: "No, but you can order one for me." Dilbert hands a sheet of paper to the boss and says: "May I go to this technical seminar in Hawaii? The boss answers: "No, but you can sign me up for it." Alice shows the boss a calendar and says: "May I take this Friday off so I have a four day weekend?" The boss answers: "No, but you can sit in for me while I take that Friday off." Wally says to the boss:"May I eat this caterpillar?" The boss answers: "Give me that." The boss is sitting at his desk all by himself and thinks: " I hope they never recognize the pattern." while he is chewing the caterpillar.
Friday August 12,
2011
Tags #business ethics, #stock market, #hedge fund, #million dollars, #insider trading, #algorithm, #winning trades, #create algorithm, #eat fiber, #money
Transcript
Dogbert: I'll pay you a million dollars a year to work at my hedge fund. I'll do the insider trading and you pretend you created an algorithm that makes winning trades. Dilbert: What if I actually create the algorithm? Dogbert: Sure, and maybe you can eat fiber and make gold, too.
Thursday November 03,
2011
Tags #depression (mental state), #despair, #ugly partment, #two ugly roomates, #ugly bus, #ugly building, #ugly cubicle, #eat lunch
Transcript
Asok: I live in an ugly apartment with two ugly roommates. Each workday I take an ugly bus to an ugly building and spend the entire day in my ugly cubicle. Dilbert: At least you get to eat lunch with us. Asok: I've said too much.
Wednesday August 16,
1989
Tags #Dogbert, #critics, #aliens, #eat, #bug, #reptilian, #gerbil, #game show, #visionary, #television
Transcript
Dogbert sits on a pillow listening to a radio news broadcast. The newscaster says, "Critics continued their accusations that the management of Megaslime Corporation is made up of reptilian aliens from another planet." The newscaster continues, "A company spokesman offered to eat a bug and not enjoy it, thus proving they are not reptilian." The newscaster continues, "Critics responded by insisting on a live gerbil instead of a bug. Merv Griffin announced that he would launch a new game show based on the concept." Dogbert says, "The man is a visionary."
Thursday March 22,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #blind date, #biggest, #woman, #chance, #financially, #surviving, #dinner, #eat, #starch, #pasta, #banned, #life
Transcript
The caption says, "Dilbert greets his blind date." Dilbert thinks, "This is the biggest woman I've ever seen." Dilbert says, "Uh . . . Hi." Dilbert thinks, "I have only one chance of financially surviving dinner." The woman says, "Hi." Dilbert says, "Say . . . Why don't we go to the 'All-you-can-eat House of Starch and Pasta?'" The woman replies, "Can't . . . Banned for life."
Monday November 12,
1990
Tuesday December 25,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #lab, #model, #automatic, #dentures, #program, #eat, #meat, #loaf, #asleep, #boss, #johnson
Transcript
Dilbert and the Boss stand in the laboratory. Dilbert says, "This is the first lab model of automatic dentures." Dilbert explains, "You can program them to eat a meat loaf for you while you sleep . . . Quite a little time saver." Inside the lab, the Boss asks, "Weren't you working with Johnson?" Dilbert replies, "Ooh . . . Bad news about Johnson, sir."
Wednesday March 27,
1991
Tags #Dogbert, #mutt, #chew, #assignment, #homework, #dog, #eat
Transcript
A boy walks up behind Dogbert and yells, "Yo! Mutt!!" The boy holds out a piece of paper and continues, "I need an excuse for not doing my homework. Chew on this assignment sheet and I'll say 'A dog ate it.'" The boy sits in a classroom desk and says, "A dog made me eat it." The boy's clothes are ripped and his face is dirty.
Thursday April 04,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #andy the android, #humans, #sleep, #eat, #don't, #die, #existential, #crisis
Transcript
Andy: Androids want to be like humans. Tell me what humans do. Dilbert: Mostly, they eat, sleep, and hope they don't die. Andy: That's it? Dilbert: Unless they find religion... Then they eat, sleep, and look forward to dying.
Thursday January 09,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #ratbert, #snack, #apple, #rat, #worst, #part, #eat
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk. Ratbert enters carrying an apple and says, "Snack time, Dilbert! I brought you an apple so you will like me!" Dilbert says, "Nice try, Ratbert, but I don't want to eat something that was touched by a rat." Ratbert says sadly, "The worst part is that's why I didn't eat it myself."