Eight Minutes Comic Strips
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218 Results for Eight Minutes
View 1 - 10 results for eight minutes comic strips. Discover the best "Eight Minutes" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday January 29,
1999
Tags #urgent document, #overnight drop, #nine minutes, #spare, #eight minutes, #coffee fisrt, #truck pulling away, #box, #wedge, #back bumper
Transcript
Carol stands behind Alice who is at her computer. Carol says, "I'm taking your urgent document to the overnight drop box, with nine minutes to spare." Carol says, "The box is only eight minutes away. I'll stop for coffee first." Alice grimaces. Carol says, "Don't worry. If the truck is pulling away from the box, I'll wedge this in the back bumper." Carol holds out Alice's report. Alice makes the fists of death.
Saturday December 21,
2002
Tags #technically dead, #wasn't afraid, #life in cubicle
Transcript
Dilbert is eating lunch with Alice and Wally. Dilbert says, "Technically, I was dead for eight minutes." Dilbert continues, "I don't know why I wasn't afraid." Dilbert sits in his cubicle and thinks, "Oh."
Monday August 14,
2000
Tags #not nine, #start at 8am, #ten minutes early, #work start, #late, #tardy, #hour late
Transcript
Wally says to the Boss, "I was so motivated by your pep talk yesterday that I came to work ten minutes early!" The Boss replies, "Wally, we start at eight, not at nine." Wally responds, "That's gonna cost you ten minutes."
Saturday May 22,
2021
Forty Minutes Late
Tags #business, #jerk, #late, #minutes, #punish, #sarcasm, #technology, #waiting, #cell phone
Transcript
voice from Dilbert's cell phone: i'll be forty minutes late. dilbert: i just wasted twenty minutes waiting! why didn't you tell me as soon as you knew? voice from phone: because i knew you would be a jerk about it. so i punished you. dilbert: oh.
Wednesday April 04,
2012
Tags #meetings, #late for meeting, #reschedule, #10 minutes, #late
Transcript
Coworker: I'm sorry I'm a few minutes late for our 10:50 meeting. Wally: We'll have to reschedule because I have another meeting at eleven. Tina: Reschedule? I'm only ten minutes late! Wally: Tell that to my 11:10.
Sunday June 17,
2012
Tags #telephones, #reprogrammed speed dial, #cellphone, #calls himself, #intelligence test, #hold on, #failed intelligence test, #20 minutes
Transcript
Dilbert: I reprogrammed our pointy-haired boss/ speed dial on his desk phone. Now every time he tries to use speed dial, it calls his own cellphone. It's like an intelligence test. I want to see how long it takes him to figure it our. Boss: I'd better take this. Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? Hold on. Hold on. For the hundredth time, don't tell me to hold on! I'm telling you to hold on! Carol: Twenty minutes so far.
Thursday November 30,
1989
Tags #accident, #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #sixty minutes, #people, #Dogs
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk. Dogbert asks, "What does a dog school have in common with the tv show 'Sixty Minutes?'" Dilbert turns around and answers, "They both have 'Hairy Reasoners.'" Dogbert says, "Uh . . . right." Dogbert walks away thinking, "And people wonder why dogs sometimes turn on their owners . . ."
Saturday February 03,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #racket, #singing, #greens, #blues, #darned, #depressing, #slept, #ten, #minutes
Transcript
Dogbert sits on his pillow playing a guitar. Dilbert asks, "What's all the racket?" Dogbert replies, "I'm singing the 'greens.'" Dilbert asks, "Is that like the 'blues?'" Dogbert replies, "Same beat, just not so darned depressing." Dogbert sings, "Oooh . . . My car needs a tune up and I overslept ten minutes baaabee . . ."
Tuesday August 07,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #exercise, #health club, #five minutes, #month, #health, #cardio
Transcript
Dilbert sits on a weight lifting bench holding dumbells. Dilbert thinks, "The experts used to say you should exercise every day." Dilbert thinks, "Now they think twenty minutes every other day is just as good." Dilbert collapses onto the bench and thinks, "My strategy of five minutes a month is looking pretty clever."
Monday September 09,
1991
Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #faked, #hollywood, #minutes, #world, #news, #major, #stories, #string, #attached, #space, #shuttle, #reruns
Transcript
Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on the hassock. As they watch television, Dogbert asks, "How do we know that the news isn't faked in Hollywood?" Dogbert continues, "Why is there exactly thirty minutes of world news every night? And why don't major stories ever happen on weekends?" Dogbert points at the tv and says, "And I'm sure I see a string attached to the space shuttle." Dilbert says, "Worse yet, it's a rerun."