Email Archives Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

212 Results for Email Archives

View 1 - 10 results for email archives comic strips. Discover the best "Email Archives" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 19, 2003's comic on:

Tags #cooperate with hunt, #17 suspects, #talked to reporter, #email archives, #phone records, #linguistic patterns, #punish all of them

View Transcript

Transcript

Headline: Corporate Witch-Hunt. Catbert is standing on The Boss' desk. The Boss says, "I've narrowed the list to seventeen suspects who might have talked to that reporter." The Boss continues, "Now we'll check their e-mail archives, phone records and linguistic patterns until we identify the offender." Catbert says, "And then we can punish all of them just for being on the list." The Boss responds, "I like the way you stink."

The Long Email

Thank you for voting.
The Long Email - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 31, 2016's comic on:

Tags #communication, #laziness, #email, #tldr

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You never got back to me with your answer. Dilbert: Yes, I did. I spent three hours writing an email that tells you all you need to know. Boss: What did it say?

Tell Me What Was In The Email

Thank you for voting.
Tell Me What Was In The Email - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 01, 2016's comic on:

Tags #email, #laziness, #attention, #detail, #tldr

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I don't have time to read your long email. Tell me what it said. Dilbert: I wrote a long email because a summary would be dangerously misleading. Boss: I'll be the judge of that. Dilbert: How?!!!

Wally Doesn't Open Email

Thank you for voting.
Wally Doesn't Open Email - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 02, 2017's comic on:

Tags #aversion, #avoiding, #communication, #email, #evasion, #excuse, #work ethic

View Transcript

Transcript

Did you get the file I sent by email? No. If i open email I'll see thirty urgent messages that will ruin my entire day. Can you open it tomorrow? You should try to live in the moment.

Answering Questions In Email

Thank you for voting.
Answering Questions In Email - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 17, 2018's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #male employee, #email, #questions

View Transcript

Transcript

Male Employee: Why did you only answer one of my seven questions in my email? Dilbert: I'm penalizing you for asking too many questions in a long rambling email. Male employee: Jerk. Dilbert: That'll cost you three questions.

Dilbert Characters

Boss Email Password

Thank you for voting.
Boss Email Password - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 20, 2018's comic on:

Tags #business, #competition, #email, #obliviousness, #security, #strategy

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: We need to find out who leaked our strategy to our competition. Alice: Is your email password still 123? Boss: Stop changing the subject.

Did You Get My Email

Thank you for voting.
Did You Get My Email - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 19, 2019's comic on:

Tags #business, #email, #managers & supervisors, #office, #talking

View Transcript

Transcript

the boss: did you read my email? dilbert: yes. dilbert: are you aware that email is a substitute for talking in person? the boss thinking: i thought i heard something about that.

Clear Email From Boss

Thank you for voting.
Clear Email From Boss - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 05, 2020's comic on:

Tags #managers & supervisors, #servers, #request, #email, #reply, #project, #update, #fight, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: why didn't you upgrade the servers like i asked? dilbert: you never asked me to do that. boss: yes, i did. i told you in an email. dilbert: no, you did not. boss: i know i saw it because you replied. dilbert: i replied to a different email. boss: okay, let me find the email and show you how wrong you are. see. it clearly says, "give me a project update by thursday." dilbert: which is...an entirely different topic. boss: why are you fighting me on this?

Email Versus Meeting

Thank you for voting.
Email Versus Meeting - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 07, 2020's comic on:

Tags #business, #meeting, #email, #hugs, #e-card, #co-workers

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: is there anything you plan to do in this meeting that we couldn't have done more easily by email. alice, boss & dilbert sitting at table saying nothing. boss: hugs? dilbert: send me an e-card.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 23, 2011's comic on:

Tags #computers & peripherals, #internet & world wide web, #coupons, #email, #firewall, #malicious complience, #downside, #dogs of hell

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Mordac, I'm not getting the coupons by email that I signed up for. Can you dial back the firewall or something? Mordac: Absolutely. There's nothing I enjoy more than malicious compliance with your requests. Boss: Is there any downside? Mordac: UNLEASH THE DOGS OF HELL!