Email Two Copies Comic Strips
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831 Results for Email Two Copies
View 1 - 10 results for email two copies comic strips. Discover the best "Email Two Copies" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday June 06,
1999
Tags #email two copies, #fax, #green paper, #email, #files, #hard copy, #internet, #motivation gone, #losing consciousness, #lazy employees, #technology
Transcript
Dilbert stands at the boss' desk. The boss says, "e-mail two copies to me when you're done." Dilbert says, "Two copies? It's e0mail." The boss says, "So?" Dilbert says, "Never mind. I'll e-mail two copies." The boss says, "and fax a copy in green paper for my files." Dilbert says, "Green? It's a fax!" The boss walks Dilbert out of his office and says, "And bring me a hard copy of the internet so I can do some serious surfing." Dilbert begins to faint in the doorway. Dilbert thinks, "Motivation.... gonve.. losing consciousness.." Dilber joins the pile of passed out employess by the boss' door. The boss thinks, "How did I end up with all the lazy employees?"
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Saturday August 29,
1992
Tags #the boss, #unimportant, #requires, #action, #route, #subordinate, #inflating, #perceived, #importance, #destroying, #morale, #productivity, #luck, #copies
Transcript
The Boss sits at his desk looking through a stack of documents and thinking, "Here's something else that's totally unimportant yet requires action." The Boss thinks, "I'll route it to a subordinate, thus inflating its perceived importance and destroying both morale and productivity." The Boss thinks, "What luck, I got two copies!"
Thursday July 14,
2011
Tags #cruelty, #fraternization, #friendship, #new engineer, #ginat dork, #star wars chess set, #email, #set up date, #romantic preference, #relationships
Transcript
Carol: Have you met the new engineer? He's a gigantic dork. You two would get along great. I'll email him to set up a date with you. Is tomorrow good? Dilbert: Being a dork is not a romantic preference. Carol: He says he'll bring his "Star Wars" chess set.
Monday April 25,
1994
Tags #making copies, #spits out, #commands in, #copier paper, #photocopy, #paper flys, #crinkle
Transcript
Dilbert: Dilbert: Quantity...two sided ...reduced to 98%...collated ...with staple ....portrait ...two colors...darken legal size papaer. Think! crinkle! spit! woman: If you eat a photocopy set "This Crinkle and poet" to no. Dilbert: it makes copies too??
Wednesday August 31,
2016
The Long Email
Tags #communication, #laziness, #email, #tldr
Transcript
Boss: You never got back to me with your answer. Dilbert: Yes, I did. I spent three hours writing an email that tells you all you need to know. Boss: What did it say?
Thursday September 01,
2016
Tell Me What Was In The Email
Tags #email, #laziness, #attention, #detail, #tldr
Transcript
Boss: I don't have time to read your long email. Tell me what it said. Dilbert: I wrote a long email because a summary would be dangerously misleading. Boss: I'll be the judge of that. Dilbert: How?!!!
Sunday October 23,
2016
Tags #email, #communication, #response, #confusion, #honesty, #overshare
Transcript
Man: Did you see my email? Dilbert; Did you mean your two-page document that has about twelve questions for me sprinkled throughout? Man: Yes, that's the one. Why haven't you responded? Dilbert: It's hard to answer that question while being polite. Man: You can be honest. Dilbert: Your email was such a disorganized mess that I assumed everything you do is doomed to fail. I didn't want to waste half a day deciphering it just so I could be on the losing side. With you. Man: Next time, just say you were busy. Dilbert: And I was busy.
Thursday February 02,
2017
Wally Doesn't Open Email
Tags #aversion, #avoiding, #communication, #email, #evasion, #excuse, #work ethic
Transcript
Did you get the file I sent by email? No. If i open email I'll see thirty urgent messages that will ruin my entire day. Can you open it tomorrow? You should try to live in the moment.
Sunday April 02,
2017
Tags #tldr, #email, #communication, #patience, #criticism
Transcript
Man: Did you read my email? Dilbert: No, it was too long. Man: Maybe you could read it when you have more time. Dilbert: I never have time to read email messages that are too long. Maybe you could rewrite it to be shorter. Man: I don't have time to rewrite it. Dilbert: And I don't have time to read it. Man: If no one reads that email, it will mean I wasted two hours writing it. Dilbert: Plus, you're wasting my time right now. Don't forget to include that in your failure assessment. Man: I had high hopes for that email. Dilbert: It's a sunk cost. Let it go.