Employees Who Complain Comic Strips
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645 Results for Employees Who Complain
View 1 - 10 results for employees who complain comic strips. Discover the best "Employees Who Complain" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday April 04,
2014
Tags #complaints, #skunk opera, #analogies, #understand analogies, #employees complain, #office, #cubicle, #human relations
Transcript
Boss: Sheesh! It feels as if every employee is complaining about one thing or another today. Carol: Maybe it's because your leadership has turned this place into a skunk opera. Luckily, you don't understand analogies. Boss: That one is about singing.
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Friday October 13,
1995
Tags #human resources, #developed policy, #employees who complain, #big hole, #trick whiners, #sand, #detailed explaination, #hole, #business
Transcript
Catbert and the Boss stand on either side of a hole in the floor. Catbert says, "As Director of Human Resources I have developed a policy for handling the employees who complain." Catbert continues, "It's a big hole. I'll trick the whiners into getting in it. And then I'll cover them with sand." The Boss says, "I don't see how this could possibly work." Catbert says, "There's a detailed explanation at the bottom of the hole."
Friday March 13,
1998
Tags #hideous treatment, #employees, #elbnina factory, #forced to wear clamps, #no union, #business
Transcript
Alice hold a folder and says, "Here's my report on the hideous treatment of employees in our Elbonian factory." The Boss sits at his desk. Alice holds her hands up to her head and says, "The employees are forced to wear huge clamps on their heads." The Boss looks at the report. At the lunch table in the employee cafeteria, Alice, Wally and Dilbert sit with trays of food and large clamps on their heads. Alice says, "Then I said, 'The employees can't complain because they have no union." Wally says "Swift," and he and Dilbert frown.
Friday January 23,
2015
13 Percent Employees Engaged
Tags #employee, #employees, #engagement, #motivation, #global survey, #engaged at work, #business
Transcript
Boss: A global survey says only 13% of employees feel engaged at work. Dilbert: If you're wondering which one of your employees is engaged, it's this guy. Boss: We need ten more just like him. Dilbert: I think I just figured out what's wrong with the rest of us.
Friday July 19,
2019
Homeless Employees
Tags #concern, #cost, #employees, #homeless persons, #office workers, #pretend
Transcript
Dogbert: We need to do something about our employees being homeless. Housing costs are too high around here. Boss: Maybe we could pay them more. Dogbert: I was thinking more along the lines of pretending to be concerned. Boss: I like where you're going with this.
Monday September 16,
2019
Best Employees
Tags #big business, #confused, #employees, #customer service
Transcript
CEO: We have the best employees in the industry! Dilbert: Then why are we ranked last in customer satisfaction? CEO: I blame our customers. Wally: Why can't they be awesome like us?
Tuesday October 22,
2019
Best Employees
Tags #employees, #managers & supervisors, #best, #office workers, #industry, #attitude
Transcript
boss: we have the best employees in the entire industry. except for ted obviously. ted: wait...what? boss: and here comes the attitude.
Friday January 03,
2020
Incompetent Employees
Tags #managers & supervisors, #sarcasm, #business, #bureaucratic, #employees, #incompetent, #inefficiency, #yin, #yang
Transcript
catbert: it might my imagination, but it looks as if all of our employees are incompetent. boss: we need to create a tangle of bureaucratic rules that make it impossible for them to get anything done. catbert: you want to use inefficiency to protect us against incompetence? boss: yin and yang.
Tuesday January 28,
2020
Alice Would Complain
Tags #complain, #managers & supervisors, #assignment, #business, #technology, #problem, #solve
Transcript
boss: i was going to give this assignment to alice, but i know she would complain about it. dilbert reading paper: i don't want it either. boss: do you plan to complain about it later? dilbert: not to your face. boss: problem solved.
Thursday April 16,
2020
Show Interest In Employees
Tags #appointment, #business, #doctor, #employees, #hate, #interest, #leave, #life, #managers & supervisors, #prank, #question
Transcript
alice: i have a doctor appointment. boss: what's wrong with you? alice yelling: that's none of your stinkin' business! stay our of my life! boss to catbert: didn't you advise me to show interest in my employees? catbert: i was pranking you. they hate that.