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197 Results for Entire Comapny
View 1 - 10 results for entire comapny comic strips. Discover the best "Entire Comapny" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday December 22,
2008
Tags #blame, #costume, #date, #lying, #work clothes, #scapegoat, #depatment, #entire comapny, #men in unifrom
Transcript
Dilbert says, "I didn't have time to change out of my work clothes." Dilbert says, "I'm working as a scapegoat for my department. Someday I hope to be a scapegoat for the entire company." Dilbert says, "You told me women like men in uniform." Dogbert says, "I say things."
Wednesday November 30,
2011
Tags #employees, #secretaries (office), #manually entered data, #entire weekend, #die monster!, #business
Transcript
Carol: I manually entered all of the employee data you wanted. It took the entire weekend. Boss: I probably should have told you I no longer need it. Carol: Die! Die! Die! You inconsiderate monster! Boss: Did you really enter all of the data? Carol: Maybe. Let's call it a tie.
Friday April 19,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #sweat, #bugs, #alone, #pen, #mind, #weird, #entire, #body, #shaved, #levitate
Transcript
The caption says, "When you're alone, you start thinking weird thoughts." Dilbert sits in his desk chair thinking, "Do bugs sweat?" The caption says, "The longer you're alone, the weirder it gets." Dilbert holds a pen in his palm and thinks, "I can levitate this pen with my mind." The caption says, "Don't stay alone too long." Dilbert sits in his house thinking, "How would it feel if I shaved my entire body."
Monday August 17,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #security guard, #entire, #mind, #transport, #magic, #wonder, #creativity, #balsa wood, #tastes
Transcript
Dilbert approaches the security guard in the lobby and thinks, "It must be great to be a security guard." Dilbert walks by the security guard and thinks, "You have the entire day to let your mind transport you to magic realms of wonder and creativity." The security guard thinks, "I wonder what balsa wood tastes like."
Tuesday September 08,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #programming, #sissy, #icons, #zeros, #sometimes, #entire, #database, #program, #letter
Transcript
An older man, Dilbert and Wally sit at the lunch table. The man says, "When I started programming, we didn't have any of these sissy 'icons' and 'windows.'" The man continues, "All we had were zeros and ones - and sometimes we didn't even have ones." The man continues, "I wrote an entire database program using only zeros." Dilbert asks, "You had zeros? We had to use the letter 'O.'"
Wednesday September 23,
1992
Tags #photograph, #Dilbert, #man, #invented, #something, #entire, #product, #obsolete, #plan, #wax, #desk, #hair, #work
Transcript
A man shows a photograph to a man behind a desk and says, "His name is Dilbert. He invented something that would make our entire product line obsolete." The man behind the desk asks, "Do you have a plan?" The employee replies, "Uh . . . I could wax your desk with my hair again." The man says, "It's just crazy enough to work."
Tuesday August 16,
1994
Tags #difference, #entire day, #hamster on wheel, #new assignements, #finish work, #explaining
Transcript
Dilbert: I spent the entire day getting new assignments which left no time to actually work on anything. Dilbert: Tomorrow I'll spend the entire day explaining why I didn't finish yesterdays work. Sometimes I don't know the difference between me and hamster on a wheel. Dogbert: Hamsters dont depress me.
Monday December 12,
1994
Tags #disoriented, #entire career, #environmental hazards, #feeling tired, #nervous, #run for exit
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk. A man wearing a mask and goggles and holding some equipment says, "I'm checking the building for environmental hazards." The man holds up an instrument and asks, "Have you been feeling tired, nervous and disoriented?" Dilbert says, "You just described my entire career." The man says, "If you start feeling good, run for the exit."
Saturday January 07,
1995
Tags #ratbert, #entire computer, #silicon chip, #ate computer, #cyborg
Transcript
Dilbert is seated at his desk and Ratbert stands on the desk beside him. Dilbert shows Ratbert something in his palm and says, "Look Ratbert. An entire computer has been baked into one silicon chip." Ratbert grabs the chip and eats it, saying, "Thanks! I don't mind if I do!" Dilbert says angrily, "You ate my computer!" Ratbert holds his arms out straight, stares ahead and replies, "I'm a cyborg."
Thursday July 06,
1995
Tags #told stan, #marketing, #dna, #gullibility, #reverse process, #entire reality, #unverified, #anecdotes, #rumour, #alleged focus group, #becoming weasel, #business
Transcript
Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I jokingly told Stan in marketing that I reprogrammed his DNA. He's so gullible that he's actually changing!" Dogbert suggests, "You must use his gullibility to reverse the process. Remember, his entire reality is shaped by unverified customer anecdotes." Dilbert tells Stan, "I heard a rumor of a story of an alleged focus group where a quote taken out of context indicates you're not becoming a weasel." Stan says, "I'm not?! Yipeee!"