Ethics Course Comic Strips
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240 Results for Ethics Course
View 1 - 10 results for ethics course comic strips. Discover the best "Ethics Course" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday March 01,
2006
Tags #ethics course, #on line course, #perfect scores, #taking for boss
Transcript
What?! You only got a 'B' taking the online ethics course for me? "No one will believe you're me unless you get all perfect scores." "I...was...tired." "Why? You only did 300 push-ups for my online gym class!!!"
Thursday July 25,
2013
Tags #business ethics, #online ethics course, #kill coworker, #failed ethics test, #first employee to fail
Transcript
Catbert: You're the first employee in company history to fail the online ethics course. Wally: I protest the grading system! Ethics are subjective. There are no right answers! Catbert: You said you would kill a coworker if you knew you wouldn't get caught. Wally: It was hard to know what answer they were looking for.
Friday July 26,
2013
Tags #business ethics, #managers & supervisors, #ethics course, #failed ethics, #engineer, #grasp, #fast track, #management, #corrupt, #business, #engineering
Transcript
Boss: You failed the online ethics course for the third time. You can't be an engineer for this company if you have no grasp of business ethics. You leave me no choice. I'm putting you on the management fast track. Wally: Huh.
Sunday April 17,
2011
Tags #business ethics, #language, #best shore, #off shore, #some countries, #better than others, #racists
Transcript
Boss: And we plan to bestshore the production. Dilbert: What? Boss: We say bestshore now instead of offshore. Dilbert: Is that because we never tried to pick the best shore until now? Boss: Of course we tried to pick the best shore! Dilbert: But we never succeeded because we're incompetent? Boss: All I'm saying is that some countries are better than others! Wally: We're racists?
Wednesday July 10,
1991
Tags #Dogbert, #fred, #driving, #school, #quick, #crash course, #educational, #system
Transcript
A man stands behind a counter. The sign behind the clerk says, "Fred's Driving School: learn to drive in just five minutes." Dogbert approaches the counter and asks, "How can you teach driving in just five minutes?" The man replies, "It's a crash course."
Friday February 14,
1992
Tags #Dogbert, #lack, #ethics, #social, #conscience, #guilt, #module, #synthesized, #belief, #system, #spittle
Transcript
Dogbert says to the robot, "We need to do something about your total lack of ethics and social conscience." Dogbert continues, "I had Dilbert build this guilt module for your control board. It has the synthesized shame of every major belief system." Later, the robot says to Dilbert, "I am unworthy to roll in your spittle." Dilbert says to Dogbert, "Frankly, I liked him better before."
Monday May 09,
1994
Tags #Dogbert, #consulting company, #new course, #business, #extra brains, #liver, #ratbert
Transcript
Dogbert: The Dogbert Consulting Company will plot a new course for your business. My consultants are so smart that their brains don't fit in their heads, They have to start the extra brains to their torsos. Ratbert: why do I need a piece of liver strapped to my torso? Dogbert: I got a little carried away at the pitch meeting.
Monday October 24,
1994
Tags #confidential, #ethics offcie, #weasel boy, #ethics expert
Transcript
The Boss: "The company hired an ethics expert to help us through the gray areas." "Your calls to the ethics office are completely confidential." Dogbert: "Thanks for sharing that. I own you now, Weasel-boy."
Tuesday October 25,
1994
Tags #ethics questions, #co worker, #pentium pc, #run over foot, #car accident, #parking lot, #Dilbert
Transcript
Wally: "I have a question for the Ethics office." "If my co-worker has a 'pentium' pc and I have a 386, is it okay to run over his foot in the parking lot?" "It seemed like a long-shot when I asked."
Thursday October 27,
1994
Tags #dogbert ethics advisor, #prodcut, #mail people, #high fees, #procedure, #ethics advice, #return stupid prodcut
Transcript
"Dogbert: Ethics Advisor" "We mail our product to people and tell them it's free for one year." "Then we start nailing them with high fees because they'll forget the procedure for returning the product. They're trapped." "So, did you have some ethics advice?" "No. I asked you here so I can return your stupid product."