Evaluated Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

6 Results for Evaluated

View 1 - 6 results for evaluated comic strips. Discover the best "Evaluated" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 12, 2012's comic on:

Tags #frustration, #tech support, #ticket window, #evaluated, #how helpful, #trouble tickets, #stubborness, #obsticle, #financial success, #disconnected, #new stranger, #hating

View Transcript

Transcript

Tech Support: Hello, this is tech support. May I close your ticket now? Dilbert: Um... no. You haven't helped me yet. I just called you. Tech Support: I'm not evaluated on how helpful I am. I'm evaluated on how many trouble tickets I close. Your stubbornness is becoming an obstacle to my financial success. By the way, if our call gets disconnected, I count that as a closed ticket. Dilbert: I'll make it quick. Tech Support: What? What? I can't hear you. Dilbert: Son of a beach ball! On the plus side, my goal of hating one new stranger every day is right on track.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 14, 1996's comic on:

Tags #after merger, #reduce staff, #redundant, #employees, #evaluated, #buying company, #bald guy, #steal office furniture, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice, Wally, Dilbert and a man from the buying company sit at a conference table. The man says, "After the merger, we'll reduce staff in areas that are redundant." Wally says, "I hope the employees of this company will be evaluated fairly compared to those in the buying company." The man says, "We already have a bald guy." Dilbert asks, "Does your steal office furniture, too?"

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 10, 2003's comic on:

Tags #charging hours to project, #one meeting, #one hour, #extensive preparation, #evaluated, #57 hours, #sat quiet, #charging

View Transcript

Transcript

"Wally, why have you been charging all of your hours to my project?" "I invited you to one meeting. It lasted one hour." "Do you think I would go to a meeting without extensive preparation?" "Okay.. that's another hour." "How many more do you need explained?" "Fifty-eight." "After the meeting, I sat quietly and evaluated what everyone said. That took fity-seven hours." "Ha! You're still an hour short. Explain THAT!" "Do you mind if I sit quietly and think about that question for a while?"

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 21, 1989's comic on:

Tags #the boss, #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #Promotion, #criticism, #mule-stomped, #gopher, #bald guys

View Transcript

Transcript

A man at a desk says to Dilbert, "Well, Dilbert, you seem qualified for this promotion, but I have one concern. Since your work would be evaluated by many people . . ." The man asks, "Can you handle criticism?" Dilbert says, "Oh, easily. For example, your toupee looks like a mule-stomped gopher . . ." Back at home, Dilbert tells Dogbert, ". . . Turns out it was a trick question." Dogbert says, "Boy, you can't trust those bald guys."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 25, 1992's comic on:

Tags #Dogbert, #model, #evaluation, #advantage, #hideous, #service

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert says to a woman walking on the sidewalk, "Excuse me, would you like to take advantage of our 'Model Evaluation Service?' Only ten dollars." The woman says, "Me? Gosh, I've never thought of myself that way. Yes, I would love to be evaluated." Dogbert says, "You're hideous . . . That's ten dollars." The woman looks angry.

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 02, 2012's comic on:

Tags #cublicle, #hours worked, #judgement, #long term projects, #near term deliverables, #negotiate, #output, #work ethic, #work from home, #holy grail

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I would like to be evaluated on my output, not the hours I work. Boss: Okay. That sounds reasonable. Wally: It does? Wow. And I'd also like to work at home where there are fewer distractions so I can be more productive. Boss: Okay. That makes sense. Wally: Really? I mean... great! I'd also like to work on long-term projects that have no near-term deliverables. Holy grail, holy grail, holy grail. Boss: Go back to your cubicle and don't leave until five o'clock. Wally: I was this close to retiring at full pay.