Every Yahoo Comic Strips
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460 Results for Every Yahoo
View 1 - 10 results for every yahoo comic strips. Discover the best "Every Yahoo" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday February 16,
1994
Tags #appointment, #booked, #every yahoo, #set priorities, #calendar
Transcript
The Boss: As the leader of this organization it's my job to set priorities. Carol: Heres your calendar, I booked you through next year with every yahoo who could dial your number. The Boss: Maybe I'll call this a priority.
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Wednesday January 12,
2011
Tags #engineers, #vaccinnations, #wicked case, #disease, #heat, #every seven years, #kill me!
Transcript
Dilbert: My doctor says I have a wicked case of Pop Farr. Its when vulcans and engineers go into gear every seven years. Alice: Im pretty sure, I don't care but let me check my calendar just in case... Alice: Someone kill me! Now Now! Now! continued
Saturday July 23,
2011
Tags #competition (psychology), #stop level meeting, #confidentail, #retribution, #every day retribution
Transcript
Boss: Your annual skip-level meeting with my boss is next week. Everything you say about me is confidential. But just to be on the safe side, I scheduled my retribution for every day of the following year.
Friday October 14,
2011
Tags #debates, #discussion, #researching every state, #engineer, #solemn duty, #stamp out ignorance, #real thing, #googled it, #engineering
Transcript
Woman: Please stop researching every statement I make. Dilbert: I can't. As an engineer, it is my solemn duty to stamp out ignorance. Woman: That's not a real thing. Dilbert: See for yourself. I just Googled it.
Friday November 01,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #world, #worse, #been, #born, #wait, #turn, #computer, #every, #night, #electricity, #meaning, #life, #today, #bedroom, #light, #day
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk thinking, "Would the world be any worse off if I'd never been born?" Dilbert thinks, "Wait . . . If not for me, who would turn off this computer every night. I'm saving electricity!" Dilbert arrives at home carrying his briefcase and says to Dogbert, "I found meaning in my life today." Dogbert says, "You left your bedroom light on all day."
Friday September 30,
1994
Tags #after every typo, #point and click, #poorly documented commands, #reboot, #interface
Transcript
"We could design the product with a simple point - and - click interface..." "Or we could require the user to choose among thousands of poorly documented commands, each of which must be typed exactly right on the first try." "Bear in mind, we'll never meet a customer ourselves." "Make it so they have to reboot after every typo."
Monday May 15,
1995
Tags #sign, #business case, #web server, #crosses all deaportments, #every director, #evp, #ted griffin, #half eagle, #half lion
Transcript
Dilbert asks the Boss, "Who needs to sign my business case to buy a web server?" The Boss says, "Hmm . . . This crosses all departments. I fear it. Get the approval of every director, every VP, every EVP, plus Griffin." As Dilbert walks away he asks, "Do you mean Ted Griffin in finance or the mythical griffin beast that's half eagle, half lion?" The Boss answers, "Whichever is harder."
Monday November 13,
1995
Tags #write bug free software, #ten dollar bonus, #find and fox, #right behavior, #new minivan, #afternoon
Transcript
The Boss, Dilbert, Wally and Alice sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "Our goal is to write bug-free software. I'll pay a ten-dollar bonus for every bug you find and fix." Dilbert, Wally and Alice throw their arms up in excitement. Dilbert yells, "Yahoo!" Alice yells, "We're rich!" Wally yells, "Yes!!! Yes!!! Yes!!!" The Boss says, "I hope this drives the right behavior." Wally says, "I'm gonna write me a new minivan this afternoon!"
Tuesday August 06,
1996
Tags #career day, #co workers, #email, #every person, #red faced monkey, #torrid love letter, #professionalism
Transcript
Tina thinks, "I accidentally sent my torrid love letter to every person on our e-mail system." Tina peers out of her cubicle and thinks, "Should I hide forever or can I count on the professionalism of my co-workers?" Wally points to Tina's cubicle and says, "We'll complete our 'Career Day' tour with an exhibit that I call 'Tina, the Red-Faced Monkey of Love.'" Three children look in the cubicle and one says, "It's hiding."
Monday February 03,
1997
Tags #every department, #create web page, #internal network, #include enough info, #security precaution
Transcript
The Boss, Dilbert, Wally and Alice sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "Every department is required to create a Web page for our internal network." The Boss continues, "It should include enough information to be difficult to maintain, but not so much that it's useful." The Boss continues, "As a security precaution, we'll make it too dull and unorganized to read." Wally asks, "Is pornography in or out?"