Executive Pay Comic Strips
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422 Results for Executive Pay
View 1 - 10 results for executive pay comic strips. Discover the best "Executive Pay" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday July 03,
2013
Tags #executives, #wages, #media, #overpaid, #ceos, #executive pay, #sultan of brunei, #larry elliosn, #god, #Religion, #Entertainment, #money
Transcript
CEO: The media is saying I'm overpaid compared to other CEOs. That's crazy. Do a benchmark study of executive pay, including the Sultan of Brunei, Larry Ellison, and God. Make sure my pay ends up somewhere in the middle so it doesn't look suspicious.
Monday July 21,
2008
Tags #moral compass, #healed, #position of power, #narrow gap, #executive pay, #worker pay
Transcript
Dilbert says, "My moral compass has healed. Can I keep my new job in management?" Dilbert says, "I'd like to use my position of power to narrow the gap between executive and worker pay."
Sunday October 05,
1997
Tags #dilbert mother, #promoted, #executive engineer, #same pay, #responsibility, #throw party, #no gifts, #no music, #no food, #no guests, #business cards
Transcript
Dilbert is on the phone while Dogbert watches. Dilbert says, "Mom, guess what.. I got promoted!" Dilbert says, "You're talking to the new Executive Engineer." Dilbert says, "No.. nobody reports to me. No... it's the same pay as before." Dilbert says, "But I do get a lot more responsibility!" Dogbert's ears fly up. Dilbert puts his hand over the telephone receiver and says to Dogbert, "She's going to throw a party for me!" Dilbert's Mom sits on the couch and says, "No.. no gifts. No... no music. No... no food. No.. no guests." Dilbert says, "I guess it's just you and me." Dilberts mom says, "I'm busy that day." Dilbert and Dogbert sit at a table wearing party hats. Dilbert says, "I'm not allowed to get new business cards, but I can write my new title on the old ones!" Dogbert falls asleep.
Monday October 03,
1994
Tags #consulting comany, #executive compensation, #ninety percent, #overpaid, #repeat business
Transcript
Dogbert: the dogcart consulting company has reviewed the executive compensation plan as you requested. My conclusion is that you're already hideously overpaid, Im recommending ninety percent pay cuts and a whack in th head for each of you. I"ll bet you don't get much repeat business. Dogbert: Oh yeah, as if Id want to spend more time with you.
Tuesday July 13,
1999
Tags #all the copies, #bestseller, #house as colleral, #dump, #pay back, #dogbert gets loan
Transcript
Caption: "Dogbert gets a loan" Dogbert sits across the desk from a bank executive. Dogbert wags his tail and says, "I plan to buy all the copies of hte book I authored, thus making it a bestseller." Dogbert says, "And I'd like to use your house as collateral. Unless it's a dump." The banker says, "How are you planning to pay us back?" dogbert says, "Do you take books?"
Sunday November 30,
2003
Tags #manager of executive compensation, #plan to steal, #meeting, #back slapping, #pormises, #raises, #ponys, #vacations, #huge raise, #business
Transcript
Boss: "I'd like you to meet Bradley, our new manager of executive compensation." Boss: "Bradley's job is to recommend to our board how much to pay company executives such as me." "Bradley is totally objective." Bradley: "Totally." "That was a world-class observation, so I'll recommend that the company buy you a pony." "...A STRONG pony to carry the huge bags of cash I recommend for you." Boss: "Good work, Bradley. I'll recommend to the board that you get a huge raise!" Dilbert: "Gaaa!! Stop pretending to have reasons!! Just steal the stupid money!!!" Boss: "See what I have to deal with every day?" Bradley: "Would an extra month of vacation reduce the sting?"
Thursday April 07,
2011
Tags #engineers, #managers & supervisors, #ventriloquism, #finishing projects, #early, #powerpoint, #presentation, #executive retreat, #dead boss hand puppet, #business
Transcript
Man says, "The engineering department is finishing all of their projects early and we don't know why." CEO says, "Tell them to do a powerpoint presentation at the next executive retreat to share their methods." Asok says, "Now it's my turn to use the dead boss hand puppet!" Alice says, "Uh-oh."
Wednesday January 26,
2011
Tags #commerce, #economic policy, #utax incentives, #projects, #tax savings, #executive bonuses, #stimulate economy, #trickle on your heads, #trickle down theory, #poker night
Transcript
The Boss says, "We've decided to use the new tax incentives on the projects we were going to do anyway." The Boss says, "The tax savings will go toward executive bonuses, which stimulate the economy via the 'trickle on your heads' theory." Alice says, "It's called the 'trickle down' theory." The Boss says, "Not on poker night."
Monday January 31,
2011
Tags #fear, #terrorists, #viruses, #elbonian kidnappers, #refused ransom pay, #stockholm syndrome, #identifying with captors, #beating up, #contagious
Transcript
Asok says, "I thought my Elbonian kidnappers would hold me forever because you refused to pay the ransom." Asok says, "Then the Stockholm effect kicked in. I started identifying with my captors and beating myself." The Boss says, "And they let you go?" Asok says, "Apparently it looked contagious."
Thursday September 01,
2011
Tags #writing, #writing materials, #executive leadership, #money good, #pie chart, #kitten
Transcript
Boss: Can you word that more simply? I need to explain it to the executive leadership. Alice: Money be god. This make more. Oogah! Boss: That was uncalled for? Alice: I can replace the pie chart with a kitten.