Extreme Managing Comic Strips

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68 Results for Extreme Managing

View 1 - 10 results for extreme managing comic strips. Discover the best "Extreme Managing" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 19, 2013's comic on:


Tags #cruelty, #exhaustion / tiredness, #workload, #emailed assignments, #extreme managing, #killing employees

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Alice: We need to talk about my workload. Boss: Okay. I just emailed you two more assignments that I need finished by tomorrow. Alice: You are literally killing me. Boss: I call it extreme managing.

Sean From Extreme Marketing

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Sean From Extreme Marketing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 22, 2019's comic on:


Tags #extreme, #marketing, #sean, #brainwashing, #technology, #unapprove, #first

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Boss: This is Sean from the extreme marketing department. He's here to tell us about our new brainwashing technology. Dilbert: I don't approve of brainwashing. Sean: That's why I'm going to do you first.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 08, 2011's comic on:


Tags #critics, #employees, #laziness, #big picture guy, #lesser minds, #managing, #implementing, #not getting it, #business

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Wally: I've decided to become more of a big picture guy. Lesser minds can do the managing and implementing while I criticize them for not :getting it". Dilbert: So...you want to get paid to be a jerk? Wally: said the implementer.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 06, 1994's comic on:


Tags #managing, #marketing group, #previous manager killed, #parking lot, #run down, #murder, #apathy to murder, #body on bumper

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The Boss: "In addition to my current duties, I'll be managing the marketing group." "The marketing job opened because the previous manager got run down in the parking lot." "When they needed a good manager, they knew where to look." Dilbert: "Under your bumper?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 08, 2000's comic on:


Tags #managing instanct, #belly button lint, #leave employee, #unhygenic, #weird, #intimate, #gone too far

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The boss is sticking his hands in his shirt and thinks: "I've got a good crop of lint in my belly button today." The boss thinks: "I'll leave it on Dilbert's keyboard." The boss thinks: "I wonder if there's such a thing as managing too much by instict."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 10, 2001's comic on:


Tags #managing by exception, #do good job, #project important, #name

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The Boss comes into Wally's cubicle and says, "From now on I'll be managing by exception." The Boss continues, "If I don't talk to you for months, assume you're doing a good job." The Boss continues talking, saying "...Or that you're project isn't important...Or that I don't remember your name."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 10, 2001's comic on:


Tags #bad data, #data, #grossly inaccurate, #managing is hard

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The Boss says to Wally and Dilbert, "All of our data is grossly inaccurate... but I need data in order to manage." The Boss continues, "If I concentrate hard enough I can forget that the data is bad. Then I can use it." Wally and Dilbert watch as The Boss shakes with clenched teeth. Wally says, "I have to give him credit.; managing is harder than it looks."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 09, 2003's comic on:


Tags #40 hours, #everyone, #likes asok, #minute old, #new system, #work one computer, #extreme programming

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The Boss says to Wally, Dilbert, Asok, and Alice, "We're going to try something called Extreme Programming." The Boss continues, "First, pick a partner. The two of you will work at one computer for forty hours a week." Dilbert and Alice jump on Asok and cling to him. Wally says, "The new system is a minute old and I already hate everyone."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 10, 2003's comic on:


Tags #extreme programming, #ruin my life, #user story, #Features

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Extreme Programming. Dilbert says to a business associate, "I can't give you all of these features in the first version." Dilbert continues, "And each feature needs to have what we call a 'user story.'" The business associate responds, "Okay, here's a story: you give me all of my features or I'll ruin your life.'"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 11, 2003's comic on:


Tags #extreme programming., #code writing, #team, #tw programmers, #one computer, #productive arrangement, #whistle both nostrils, #saved on harmonicas, #business

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Extreme Programming. Wally and Dilbert are sitting at one computer. The Boss approaches and says, "The two of you will be a code-writing team." The Boss continues, "Studies prove that two programmers on one computer is the most productive arrangement." Dilbert types with a furrowed brow. Wally says, "Sometimes I can whistle through both nostrils. I've saved a fortune in harmonicas."