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94 Results for Facebook Page
View 1 - 10 results for facebook page comic strips. Discover the best "Facebook Page" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday February 10,
2013
Tags #dog, #facebook, #facebook page, #internet & world wide web, #linkedin, #stocks, #twitter, #websites, #work ethic, #working from home, #distractions, #animals
Transcript
Dilbert: I'm working at home today. It will be as if we're co-workers. Dogbert: Ugh. This madness must stop! You should check your Facebook page to see what's new. You should check Twitter. Dilbert: I'm almost finished with Facebook. Dogbert: Did you get my LinkedIn request? Dilbert: I'll check. Dogbert: I send you some links to funny websites. Dilbert: Cool! I just spent ten hours at my computer and I can't remember why I was sitting there in the first place. Dogbert: You were going to check your stocks. Dilbert: Okay. That sounds right. Two Hours Later. Two Hours Later. Two Hours Later.
Sunday November 06,
2011
Tags #interviews, #suspicion, #job interview, #brand online, #blog, #tweets, #facebook, #credit, #criminal record, #transcripts, #refrences, #external stuff, #attitude, #yrine test, #dna test, #tanning bed, #mri, #psychology
Transcript
Job interview Boss: I researched your personal brand online. Man: My what? Boss: I looked at your blog, your Tweets, an your Facebook page. I Googled your name and followed every link. I checked your credit, criminal record, school transcripts, and references. But that's just the external stuff. Man: Exactly. It's my attitude that counts! Boss: No. I mean I also have the results of your urine test. Oh, and apparently some of your sample landed in a DNA test kit. And that tanning bed you used last week was actually an MRI. How's your attitude now? Man: Harder to fake.
Saturday October 30,
2010
Tags #employee, #human resources, #Promotion, #raise, #facebook; social networks, #excited, #business
Transcript
Catbert says, "For the past six months you've done nothing but update your Facebook page." Catbert says, "Now we have an opening for a marketing manager for social networks and you're totally qualified. It's a huge raise and promotion." Man says, "Crime pays! I knew it!!!" Catbert says, "We're hoping you can lie as well as you steal."
Monday April 11,
2011
Tags #fraternization, #internet & world wide web, #friends with ghoats, #real freinds, #imaginary ones, #idea is ridiculous, #ridiculous idea, #facebook freinds
Transcript
Dogbert: You need to create a product that gives people the illusion of being friends with ghosts. Boss: People only want real friends, not imaginary ones. Your idea is ridiculous. Dogbert: How many friends do you have on Facebook? Boss: Seven hundred. Why?
Tuesday April 12,
2011
Tags #computers & peripherals, #fraternization, #friends with ghots, #ghandi, #ghost personal page, #ghosts, #heaven, #internet & world wide web, #llincoln, #satellite pictures, #social media, #social network, #technology
Transcript
Dogbert: Our new product will be a social network for people who want to be friends with ghosts. We'll post satellite pictures on each ghost's personal page and say the photos were taken from heaven. Man: Abraham Lincoln posted new pictures. Woman: I'm chatting with Gandhi! Later.
Thursday February 10,
2011
Tags #executives, #meetings, #Dogbert, #consulting, #facebook, #china, #irrelevant, #breakout groups, #fantasize, #being relevant
Transcript
Dogbert Consults Dogbert: "Where does your company fit on this comprehensive list?" Facebook, China, Irrelevant Dogbert says, "Now let's form breakout groups to fantasize about being relevant."
Friday February 11,
2011
Tags #competition (psychology), #inventions, #facebook, #robot arm, #talented employees, #giant condescending facebook
Transcript
Catbert says, "Facebook has created a giant robot arm to steal talented employees from other companies." Catbert says, "It's here!!!" Catbert says, "No, it looks like we got the giant condescending Facebook robot arm instead."
Friday March 09,
2012
Tags #dating, #internet & world wide web, #dating site, #social media, #propsects, #addicted, #facebook, #pain meds, #prescription pain meds, #eye contact, #relationships, #technology
Transcript
Dilbert: I've got two good prospects on this dating site. One is addicted to Facebook and the other is addicted to prescription pain meds. Dogbert: Sort of a tie. Dilbert: But only one of them is likely to make eye contact.
Thursday March 29,
2012
Tags #page layout, #ugly, #ugly cubicle, #aesthetics, #barber, #parents, #trample
Transcript
Dilbert: Your page layout is ugly. Tina: Whose fault is that? I work in an ugly cubicle surrounded by ugly people. You trample on my sense of aesthetics and expect me to be unaffected? Dilbert: So... it's my fault? Tina: You, your parents, your barber, and whoever dresses you.
Friday October 30,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #man, #employee, #information, #binder, #saliva, #page-turning, #hand, #pages, #stuck
Transcript
Dilbert sits at a table with a bearded man. The man says, "Let me show you where the information is in your binder." The man licks his fingers and says, "First, I'll need a good load of saliva on my page-turning hand." Dilbert says, "Maybe you can show me in YOUR binder." The man replies, "Can't . . . Somehow my pages got all stuck together."