Fake Clone Comic Strips
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109 Results for Fake Clone
View 1 - 10 results for fake clone comic strips. Discover the best "Fake Clone" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday January 29,
2003
Tags #visibuddy, #mindless replica, #increases visibility, #golf, #nice guy, #invention, #fake clone, #robot, #Sports
Transcript
Dilbert fastens the head atop a robot of himself. He says to Dilbert, "I call my invention the 'Visibuddy.'" Dilbert continues, "It's a mindless replica that can attend meeting and increase my visibility." The Visibuddy, The Boss, and Dilbert are in a meeting. The Visibuddy asks The Boss, "Am I working hard or hardly working? Do you golf?" The Boss thinks, "Nice guy."
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Monday April 06,
2020
Extra Dogbert Clone
Tags #business, #marketing, #genius, #problem, #company, #situation, #clone, #blame
Transcript
the marketing genius dogbert: my genius alone will not be enough to fix the problems at this company. this looks like a five-dogbert situation. that is why i arranged to clone myself five times. boss: what's the extra clone for? dogbert: that one takes the blame.
Friday March 12,
2021
Deep Fake Zoom
Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #technology, #video conference, #zoom, #call, #deep fake, #program, #generic, #employee, #work, #sarcasm, #cell phone, #laptop
Transcript
dilbert looking at phone on couch at home. dogbert: i thought you said you had a zoom call that would last for hours today. dilbert: i built a "deep fake" version of myself to take zoom calls and say generic employee stuff. next slide is boss in from of laptop on video call. boss: dilbert, do you have anything to add? dilbert: i don't know if i'm working hard or hardly working. har-har!
Tuesday March 29,
2011
Tags #fake press relases, #new green technology, #scientist, #2040 power home, #refrigerator door, #science
Transcript
Dogbert says, "I'm writing fake press releases for imaginary new green energy technologies." Computer says, "Scientists say that by 2040 you will be able to power your entire home with the breeze from your refrigerator door." Dilbert says, "Now how will I know which green breakthroughs are real?" Dogbert says, "Seriously? You think there are real ones?"
Friday June 24,
2011
Tags #computers & peripherals, #internet & world wide web, #fake links, #boost search rank, #dung for barins, #shut your pie hole
Transcript
Dilbert: Google found out that we used fake links to boost our search rank. Now our website only shows up when someone enters the search string "dung for brains." Boss: They won't get away with this! Computer: Shut your pie hole.
Saturday September 17,
2011
Tags #commerce, #competition (psychology), #hate new product, #customers, #fake revenue projections, #engineer, #stronger company, #engineering
Transcript
Dilbert: If consumers hate our new product, we will probably go out of business. If they love our new product, a stronger company will enter the space and drive us out of business. CEO: Tell the engineer to stop making me sad. Boss: I have some fake revenue projections to cheer you up.
Wednesday December 28,
2011
Tags #anger, #annoyance, #online class, #improve charisma, #stupid fake charisma, #weird
Transcript
Boss: Don't let anyone disturb me. I'll be taking an online class to improve my charisma. Carol: While you're doing that, I'll be taking an online class to learn how to ignore your stupid, fake charisma. BRING IT ON! Boss: Okay, this got weird.
Sunday May 13,
2012
Tags #discussion, #ideas, #meeting, #originality, #irrational thinking, #optoistic, #new prodcuts, #faking optomisim, #fake buy in, #business
Transcript
Dilbert: ... and that's my suggestion for our next product. Alice: How do we know that ten other companies aren't working on the same idea. Dilbert: Well, that's always a possibility. Wally: There are seven billion people on Earth. I'll bet a million of them had this idea. Asok: It's irrational to think that any new product is likely to be a hit. On the other hand, we only get paid if we pretend to be optimistic about new products. Wally: All in favor of faking our optimism, raise your hands. Dilbert: All I could get was a fake buy-in. Boss: That's the only kind there is.
Thursday April 26,
1990
Tags #Dogbert, #mesozoic era, #giant, #plastic, #bone, #fake, #vomit, #wrap, #toss, #tar, #pit
Transcript
Dogbert says to Bob the Dinosaur, "You know, Bob, I always pictured you dinosaurs as . . . Uh . . . Much bigger." Bob replies, "Ah, well, you see, practical jokes were very popular in the Mesozoic era . . ." A dinosaur says to a clerk in a novelty store, "Ooh-ooh! Give me the giant plastic bone and one fake vomit!" The salesclerk asks, "Shall I wrap them or just toss them in the tar pits?"
Thursday October 04,
1990
Tags #garbageman, #device, #standard, #anti-light, #resonance, #paris, #truck, #clone, #stigma
Transcript
Dogbert says, "Please, Mister Garbage Man, help us fix Dilbert's cloning device and bring him back to life!!" The garbage man looks at the device and says, "This shouldn't be too hard . . . Standard anti-light resonance filters . . . Yeah, I think I have parts in the truck." Dogbert asks, "You're going to clone him from his own garbage?" The garbage man replies, "Don't tell anybody - there might be a stigma."