Fall Apart Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

61 Results for Fall Apart

View 1 - 10 results for fall apart comic strips. Discover the best "Fall Apart" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #absent mindedness, #cruelty, #managers & supervisors, #entrpenuer, #bullying, #lying, #manipulation, #verbal abuse, #huge jerk, #biograophy, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: You need to act more like an entrepreneur. Entrepreneurs make decisions that will end in failure 90% of the time. They motivate people through bullying, lying, manipulation and verbal abuse. Entrepreneurs make their employees work so many hours that their personal lives and their bodies fall apart. Boss: I've been doing all that stuff for years. Dogbert: Has it worked? Boss: No. Dogbert: Well, in that case, you're not an entrepreneur. You're just a huge jerk. Boss: Is that why no one is writing my biography?

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #public speaking, #stress, #10 thousand attendees, #don't be stressed, #nervous, #fall apart, #speech, #large audience

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Ted, I want you to give a speech to ten thousand conference attendees. You'll be great. Don't get stressed. I said "don't."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #blaming, #quarreling, #work independantly, #close eyes, #fall back, #better than other people

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: Today you'll learn how to work independently. In this exercise, I want you to put your arms at you side, close your eyes, and fall backward. Noise: Thud thud thud. Dogbert: And it's still better than working with other people.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #salesman, #lawn, #apart, #spend, #scam

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert points to a car and says to a customer, "How about this one?" The man says, "I don't want to spend much. I'm only going to take it apart and leave it on the lawn." The man says, "I gotta be me."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #elbonia, #elbonians, #yergi, #scrolls, #dog, #fall, #sky, #never, #shave, #duck, #literal, #interpret

View Transcript

Transcript

In Elbonia, Dogbert lies face-down in the mud in front of his crashed hover-saucer. An Elbonian points at him and says, "Look, Yergi." The Elbonian picks Dogbert up and says, "The Holy Scrolls say a dog will fall from the sky." The other Elbonian asks, "They do?" The Elbonian carrying Dogbert replies, "Actually, they say 'never shave your duck,' but it's not literal. You have to interpret." The other Elbonian asks, "You mean I CAN shave my duck?!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #anne l. retentive, #task, #deliverable, #task not verb, #falling apart, #timeline project

View Transcript

Transcript

Headline: Anne L. Retentive. Anne is sitting at her desk. The Boss approaches from behind and startles her. He says, "Anne, I'm going to task you with a deliverable." Anne exclaims, "Gaaa!! Task is not a verb!! My world is falling apart!" The Boss smirks. As he's walking away, The Boss thinks to himself, "Tomorrow I'll ask her to timeline her project."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #fall asleep, #runny nose, #sneaks in, #pinches nostrils shut

View Transcript

Transcript

Ratbert: Why does a runny nose stop running when you fall asleep? Dogbert: The nose fairly sneaks in at night and inches your nostrils shut. Ratbert: This is exactly why I don't like knowledge.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #no landing strips, #jump out of plane, #airplane, #mud, #cushion, #fall, #flap arms

View Transcript

Transcript

"Elbonia has no landing strips, so you'll have to jump our of the plane." "Try to flap your arms and aim for a plump Elbonian to cushion your fall." "Dang." "Airplane."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #catch, #fall, #fall back, #frustration, #gone wrong, #learn trust, #lesson, #questioning, #test fall, #tolerate co owrkers

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: Wally, how can I learn to tolerate my co-workers? Wally: It is time for you to learn about trust, Asok. Let me show you. Turn around. This is called the "trust fall." You fall backward and trust me to catch you... go. Asok: Why didn't you catch me?!!! Wally: It wouldn't be trust if it worked every time. Asok: What kind of lesson is that? Wally: This is how I tolerate my co-workers.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #deception, #flattery, #suspicion, #manipulate, #full benefit, #wisdom, #george clooney

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: We can manipulate the pointy-haired menace into picking the right plan by comparing it to the worst alternatives. Alice: But then we wouldn't get the full benefit of his wisdom. Dilbert: Is he behind me? Alice: It might be George Clooney. I can't tell them apart.