Fed Comic Strips
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10 Results for Fed
View 1 - 10 results for fed comic strips. Discover the best "Fed" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday March 04,
1992
Tags #Dogbert, #amazingly, #ignorant, #people, #visit, #economics, #fed, #increased, #money, #supply, #interview, #Politics
Transcript
Dogbert stands in front of a television camera holding a microphone. Dogbert says, "Welcome to Dogbert's World of Amazingly Ignorant People." Dogbert continues, "Tonight we'll visit people who don't understand economics but talk about it anyway." A man says, "So, I heard the Fed increased the money supply, but I checked my bank balance and it's the SAME as before." Another man says, "That isn't fair."
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Friday November 13,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #floyd, #co-wokers, #fed, #attitude, #kill, #dres, #quarterly, #accomplishment, #report
Transcript
Dilbert stands in front of Floyd's desk and says, "I've got to tell you, Floyd, that your co-workers are so fed up with your attitude that they asked me to . . . Uh . . . Kill you." Floyd screams, "What??!" Dilbert says, "Heh-heh . . . Of course there's no way I'd actually . . ." Floyd grabs his throat and says, "Erk! Mmph . . ." Floyd falls off his chair. Dilbert thinks, "I'm really going to have to dress this up on my quarterly accomplishment report."
Wednesday July 11,
2001
Tags #mother could use, #moron, #mother fed boss, #Dilbert, #desk, #computer, #together, #bug in computer, #technology
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his computer as the Boss sits behind him saying, "It needs to be so easy that your mother could use it." Dilbert replies, "My mother isn't a moron. Maybe we could use your mother as the test." The Boss asks, "What makes you think my mother is a moron?" Dilbert says, "She fed you."
Wednesday March 25,
2015
Wally Does Economic Babble Talk
Tags #bitcoins, #confusion, #conversation, #economics, #jargon, #success, #the fed
Transcript
Wally: Do you think The Fed should liquidate its Bitcoins or let the dollar float with Libor rates? Boss: Maybe we could just sit quietly until the others arrive. Wally: Success.
Saturday August 04,
1990
Tags #Dogbert, #rabert, #lab rats, #stupid, #professor, #heart, #laboratory, #escaping
Transcript
Rabert: Goodbye, Dogbert, I must return to the lab with the professor. Dogbert: That's stupid. Rabert: He says he loves me. That must be why he fed me so much. Dogbert: You're getting stupider. Rabert: I have to follow my heart. Dogbert: Mmm... Love causes stupidity in lab rats.
Tuesday October 06,
1992
Tags #Dilbert, #abducted, #aliens, #hypnotized, #dark, #room, #row, #seats, #popcorn, #substance, #feet, #disgusted, #dollars, #enter, #ship, #suppressed, #memory
Transcript
Dilbert sits at a table with Dogbert and says, "I didn't remember being abducted by aliens until you hypnotized me. But now I remember they looked like 'E.T.'" Dilbert looks at a drawing and continues, "I remember being in a dark room with rows of seats. They fed us a popcorn-like substance. My feet were stuck to the floor." Dilbert continues, "I recall being disgusted that they charged me six dollars to enter the ship." Dogbert says, "That's why you suppressed the memory."
Sunday August 27,
1989
Tags #Dilbert, #dream, #hillbillies, #lint, #lint farm, #stranger than fiction
Transcript
Dilbert joins Dogbert at the breakfast table. He says, "I had the weirdest dream last night . . ." Dogbert replies, "You probably think I want to hear all about it." Dilbert says, "I was kidnapped by hillbillies and forced to produce pocket lint on their illegal lint farm." Dilbert pictures himself hanging from the ceiling with tubes connected to his pockets. Dilbert continues, "They fed me only flannel and water, and mined my pockets twice a day." Dilbert is hooked up to a machine. Dilbert says, "Thank God it was only a dream . . ." Dogbert says, "Only a dream? Maybe you should check your pockets." Dilbert puts his hands in his pockets and screams, "Lint!!" Dogbert looks at the reader and says, "Stranger than fiction."
Friday May 29,
1998
Tags #fertility drugs in coffeee, #bloated, #hoagie, #evidence of pregnancy, #weight gain
Transcript
Alice and a bloated Dilbert sitting at a table with meals. Dilbert says, "I've been eating like crazy since Dogbert put the fertility drugs in my coffee." Dilbert pats his bloated belly and continues, "I'm guessing I have ten or fifteen babies in there. It's hard to keep them fed." Alice says, "And your only evidence of pregnancy is weight gain?" As Dilbert lifts a sandwich to his mouth, he says, "Here comes another hoagie, kids!"
Monday December 17,
2001
Tags #serve food, #homeless on christmas, #extra hungry, #one day, #news crews arrive
Transcript
Tina says to Dilbert, "I'm signing up volunteers to serve food to the homeless on Christmas day." Dilbert responds, "How do you know in advance that they'll be extra hungry on that one day?" Tina responds, "Our P.R. firm makes sure they don't get fed for two days before the news crews arrive."
Tuesday September 28,
2004
Tags #liosuction, #disappeared, #head one, #eating donuts, #being fed donuts
Transcript
Dilbert: "How did the liposuction go?" The boss: "Good." "People say I look younger. And thanks to my self-discipline, I'll keep off the weight." "One more."