Feel Gross Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

441 Results for Feel Gross

View 1 - 10 results for feel gross comic strips. Discover the best "Feel Gross" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 04, 2012's comic on:

Tags #work ethic, #employee survey, #respect and dignity, #feel gross, #disgust, #paper towel

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: The first question on the employee survey is... Do you feel you are valued and treated with respect and dignity? Dilbert: Well, let me put it this way... you know how sometimes you step in something gross and then you have to wipe it off your shoe with a paper towel? Catbert: So... you feel like the paper towel? Dilbert: No, the paper towel has a purpose. Catbert: So... you feel like the gross stuff on the shoe? Dilbert: No, the gross stuff gets to leave. I feel like a shoe that has gross stuff on the bottom and a sweaty foot shoved all the way to the end of its sole. Catbert: I'll leave this one blank. Dilbert: Because my opinions don't matter?

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 02, 2011's comic on:

Tags #golf, #managers & supervisors, #rich people, #sense of passion, #feel different, #Sports, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: The experts say Is house motivate you by displaying my own sense of passion and purpose. I love getting rich at your expense....and golfing!!! Do you feel and different? Dilbert: Yup.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 16, 2011's comic on:

Tags #conversation, #language, #positive feel, #power cables, #insulated

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Avoid saying "unfortunately" when you talk to customers. Say instead, "as it turns out." That has a more positive feel. Dilbert: As it turns out, our power cables aren't as insulated as we had hoped.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 22, 2011's comic on:

Tags #joking, #questioning, #feel free, #questions, #ghosts have clothes, #wedgie

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Are there any questions? Feel free to ask anything at all. Wally: Why do ghosts have clothes? Dilbert: If someone gives you a wedgie at the moment you die, will you have it for eternity?

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 29, 2011's comic on:

Tags #doctors' offices, #illness, #bad case, #wahtchamacallit, #pills, #doctors offcie, #doctor, #wicked hemorrhoids, #feel like progress, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

Doctor: You've got a bad case of whatchamacallit. These pills won't fix your underlying problem, but they might give you a wicked case of hemorrhoids. And I can treat hemorrhoids, so that would feel like progress.

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 05, 2011's comic on:

Tags #embarrassment, #obliviousness, #hired consultant, #less confident, #overconfident people, #don't recognize mistakes, #didn't know studies, #feel like idiot

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I hired a consultant to teach us how to be less confident. Dilbert: Is that because research has shown that overconfident people don't recognize their own mistakes? Boss: Now I feel like an idiot because I didn't know about those studies. Dogbert: I did him first.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 01, 1990's comic on:

Tags #grumpy dog, #no flattery, #chocolate cake, #feel better, #scratch behind ears, #leg spasms

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits in his chair reading the newspaper and Dogbert stands on the hassock. Dogbert says, "I'm grumpy today, so don't even try to talk to me." Dogbert continues, "And don't try to flatter me or give me chocolate cake to make me feel better." Dilbert says, "And I guess I shouldn't scratch you behind the ears until you have little leg spasms." Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs and says, "Right. None of that."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 28, 1990's comic on:

Tags #bob, #dawn, #library, #reference, #wondering, #dinosaurs, #eggs, #gross, #telephone

View Transcript

Transcript

Bob the Dinosaur says into the phone, "Hello, is this the library reference desk?" Bob says, "I have this . . . er . . . friend . . . who was wondering how dinosaurs have eggs. Uh-huh." Bob says to Dawn, "It's gross."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 25, 1991's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #gravity, #invention, #half, #net, #land, #money, #jump, #ledge, #gross

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert reads a document and says, "Dogbert, I sold the rights to my anti-gravity invention. I get to keep half of the 'net.'" Dilbert says, "I wonder what 'net' means." Dogbert responds, "Net is what you land in after you find out you get no money and jump off a ledge." Dilbert asks, "What if there is no net?" Dogbert replies, "It's gross."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 12, 1991's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #bob, #nostradogbert, #world, #end, #range, #business, #gross, #prophet, #margin

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert, who is wearing a turban, says to Bob the Dinosaur, "Nostradogbert predicts that the world will end within a hundred billion years." Bob says, "That's a big range." Dogbert says, "We in the business call it the 'Gross Prophet Margin.'" Bob says, "Oh yeah, I've heard of that."