Fertilized Plant Comic Strips

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40 Results for Fertilized Plant

View 1 - 10 results for fertilized plant comic strips. Discover the best "Fertilized Plant" comics from Dilbert.com.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags boss's office, employee, exciting challenges, fertilized plant, hard work done, tree grows

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Asok: "I worked nights and weekends to finish my project ahead of schedule." The Boss: "Good. Here's more work." Asok: "I don't understand. Am I being punished for working hard?" The Boss: "No, you're being rewarded with exciting new challenges." Asok: "Why does the plant grow faster when you say things like that?" The Boss: "No reason." "Stop that!" "Anyway, your annual performance review will award your hard work." Wally: That is one fertilized plant

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags employees fertilizer, management, organism, plant, survive and grow, weasels, dogbert consults

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Caption reads: "Dogbert Consults." The Boss is leaning back in his chair and listening to Dogbert who is standing on the Boss's desk. Dogbert advises: "Management is like an organism that needs to survive and grow." He continues: "Employees are your fertilizer." The Boss asks: "So I'm like a well-fertilized plant?" Dogbert answers: "No, and sadly, weasels don't need fertilizer."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags fantasy, money, shrubs, budget estimates, spreadhseet, ipad, plant growing, well fertilized

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Asok: I put your budget estimates into a spreadsheet as you asked. A well-fertilized shrub sprouted out of my iPad. What does this mean? Boss: That's how you know the budget is done.

Potted Plant

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Potted Plant - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, communication, job, managers & supervisors, sarcasm, employees, feelings, potted plant, new, boss

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ceo: the only reason you have a job is so i don't have to talk to employees. but i still talk to you every day, so i hired a potted plant to be your new boss. boss: i feel deeply insulted. ceo: see? a plant would never feel that way.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, plant, suicide, note

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Dilbert kneels on the floor looking at a plant in a broken pot. Dilbert says to Dogbert, "It's weird . . . I was just talking to it like I ususally do and it fell off the desk . . ." Dogbert asks, "What's this little piece of paper?" Dogbert reads, "I couldn't take it anymore . . ."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, freak, accident, bestow, powers, nuclear, plant, industrial, keep, out, sign

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Dilbert sits at the table wearing a super hero suit that has a hood, cape and letter "D" on the front. Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I'm tired of waiting for a freak accident to bestow super powers upon me." Dilbert says as he walks away, "I'm going to the nuclear power plant to wait for an industrial accident." Dilbert approaches an industrial plant. Three other men in super hero suits stand under a sign that says, "Keep out."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags bugs, bugs are smater, cubcicle, dumb, permission denied, plastic, plastic plant, tell the difference

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Dilbert: Id like permission to keep a plastic plant in my crucible, Security guard: Permission denied! Plants attract bugs. If I can't tell its plastic how are the bugs going to know the difference? Dilbert: With all due respect m bugs are way smarter than you. Security: Oh yeah? Id like to see them do this job.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cubicle gestapo, plastic plant, rebel, evil, anti perspirant, breaking down, take a stand

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dilbert: I'm going to defy the cubicle gestapo and keep this plastic plant on my desk. Im a rebel...Im evil. My anti perspirant is breaking down! Dilbert: Sometimes a man has to take a stand. Dogbert: could he stand someplace else?

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags sabotaged, global conspiracy, plant misspelled work, spell checker, webster

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Tina the tech writer sits at her computer. Tina says, "What the...? I've been sabotaged!" Tina stands with her arms crossed behind Wally. Wally says, "No, I'm not part of a global conspiracy to plant a misspelled word in your "spell checker". Tina holds an open dictionary. Tina says, "GASP! They got to Webster too!!"

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags chosen to design, worlds safest nuclear plant, great assignment, safe, not near my house

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The Boss says to Dilbert, "Dilbert, you have been chosen to design the world's safest nuclear power plant." Dilbert replies, "This is the greatest assignment that any engineer could hope for. I'm flattered by the trust you have in me." The Boss responds, "By 'safe' I mean 'not near my house.'"