First Email Comic Strips
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743 Results for First Email
View 1 - 10 results for first email comic strips. Discover the best "First Email" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday February 03,
1996
Tags #first email, #message, #how to use email, #forgot watch, #change jobs
Transcript
Dilbert leans out his cubicle door and yells, "Hey, Wally! The Boss sent his first e-mail message!" Dilbert says to Wally who stands behind him, "And you said he wasn't bright enough to figure out how to use e-mail!" Wally asks, "What's his message?" Dilbert reads the message, "I forgot my watch. Does anybody know what time it is?" Wally says, "Time to change jobs."
Saturday August 19,
2000
Tags #brenda utthead, #email addresses, #first inutial, #plus last name, #whiner, #butthead
Transcript
Brenda Utthead: I know our email addresses are supposed to be our first initial plans our last name. But could you make an exception? The Boss: No. That Brenda Utthead is quite a whiner,
Thursday January 06,
2005
Tags #receptionist, #director of first impressions, #send email.anger, #upsat, #realization
Transcript
Carol: Im starting to think that the director of first impressions is.... GAAA!!! IM A RECEPTIONIST!! Beat it, you walrus! Maybe I'll just send an email.
Sunday August 11,
2013
Tags #frustration, #lawyers, #software, #license, #legal dept, #services, #email, #open source, #definsition, #forge signature, #software license, #engineering
Transcript
Boss: Can you approve the purchase of this software? Boss: You need to run the software license past legal first. Lawyer: You need to fill out a legal services request form. I'll email it to you. Make sure you specify whether the software is open source or not. Dilbert: How would I know if it meets your definition of open source? Lawyer: It depends how the license is written. You'll need to ask legal to review it. Dilbert: Never mind. I'll just forge your signature on the form. Lawyer: Maybe this is why I've never seen a software license.
Sunday November 02,
2014
Tags #obliviousness, #time management, #touch, #touching, #touching paper, #turn off phone, #ignore email, #one touch, #salad tongs, #on etouch, #interupted
Transcript
Boss: The key to good time management is touching each piece of paper once. If I can only touch it once, I'd better do it right. I'll need to make sure I don't get interrupted after the first touch.Turn off my phone, close my door, and ignore email. Okay, here goes one touch. Ugh. This will take an hour and I only have ten minutes. Make a copy, throw away the original, and don't let me touch the copy until I have an hour in my schedule. I wonder if I'm allowed to use salad tongs.
Sunday March 29,
2015
Tags #distraction, #distractions, #frustration, #futility, #meeting, #meetings, #stress, #walk, #walking, #phone calls, #email, #Sports, #business
Transcript
Boss: Let's have our meeting while we take a walk. Dilbert: Absolutely. Shall I expect the usual? Boss: The usual? Dilbert: The first five minutes will be nothing but you trying to find your phone. Then you'll need to return some calls "real quick," then send an email before we leave. On the way to the elevator we will be accosted by every employee you've been avoiding for a week. Then you'll invite one of them to walk with us, which means we can't talk about my project. But it doesn't matter because you'll be on your phone the entire walk anyway. Asok: Did you know that walking lowers stress? Dilbert: Does it?!!
Wednesday August 31,
2016
The Long Email
Tags #communication, #laziness, #email, #tldr
Transcript
Boss: You never got back to me with your answer. Dilbert: Yes, I did. I spent three hours writing an email that tells you all you need to know. Boss: What did it say?
Thursday September 01,
2016
Tell Me What Was In The Email
Tags #email, #laziness, #attention, #detail, #tldr
Transcript
Boss: I don't have time to read your long email. Tell me what it said. Dilbert: I wrote a long email because a summary would be dangerously misleading. Boss: I'll be the judge of that. Dilbert: How?!!!
Friday December 30,
2016
Boss Doesn't See Email
Tags #space, #astronaut, #engineering, #laziness, #bureaucracy, #accident
Transcript
Boss: The crew of our first spaceship suffocated on the launchpad. Apparently, I got an email last week asking for approval to repair the oxygen generator. Carol: You killed them with your incompetence? Boss: I can't take all the credit. It was a team effort.
Thursday February 02,
2017
Wally Doesn't Open Email
Tags #aversion, #avoiding, #communication, #email, #evasion, #excuse, #work ethic
Transcript
Did you get the file I sent by email? No. If i open email I'll see thirty urgent messages that will ruin my entire day. Can you open it tomorrow? You should try to live in the moment.