Fish Are Stupid Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

287 Results for Fish Are Stupid

View 1 - 10 results for fish are stupid comic strips. Discover the best "Fish Are Stupid" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 28, 1992's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #flush, #goldie, #john, #ugly, #stupid, #fish, #life, #rivalry, #suicide note, #schools, #pun

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands in front of an empty fishbowl with his arms on his hips. Dilbert says to Dogbert, "You expect me to believe that Goldie flushed HIMSELF down the john??!" Dogbert replies, "Surely you don't believe that I ended his ugly, stupid fish life in a fit of pet rivalry . . ." Dilbert looks at a small piece of paper and says, "Explain how a fish can write a suicide note." Dogbert says, "I've heard they have schools . . ."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 04, 2006's comic on:

Tags #wise king salmon, #fish are stupid, #project, #right or wrong

View Transcript

Transcript

"We could do the project right for $100,000 or do it wrong for $25,000." "I believe that the wise King Salmon would say to split the difference and do it for $50,000." "Fish are stupid."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 28, 2011's comic on:

Tags #anger, #annoyance, #online class, #improve charisma, #stupid fake charisma, #weird

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Don't let anyone disturb me. I'll be taking an online class to improve my charisma. Carol: While you're doing that, I'll be taking an online class to learn how to ignore your stupid, fake charisma. BRING IT ON! Boss: Okay, this got weird.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 11, 2012's comic on:

Tags #conversation, #embarrassment, #news letter, #leadership, #sound stupid

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Good news: I signed up to receive a free leadership newsletter by email. I know it's good because it's written by some guy who used to have a job. Stop making everything I say sound stupid!

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 24, 2012's comic on:

Tags #dueling, #announcing stupid, #dumbest person, #history, #moron, #new cubicle, #education

View Transcript

Transcript

Loud Howard meets Topper Coworker: I did something stupid today!!! Topper: That's nothing. I'm the dumbest person in the history of the universe!!! Together: I'm a moron!!! Dilbert: I need a new cubicle.

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 10, 1989's comic on:

Tags #nature, #stupid, #talking

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dilbert says, ". . . And nature has a way of compensating for weakness." Dogbert asks, "Really?" Dilbert explains, "That's why blind people often develop great hearing." Dogbert says, "I guess that also explains why stupid people have big mouths."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 01, 1989's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #tv, #cable tv, #arm chair, #remote, #spit, #taste, #boring, #stupid, #theme

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits in his chair watching television. The voice on the tv says, "Tonight Siskel and Ebert review Dilbert's life." Ebert says, ". . . Boring and stupid . . . Look out, Gene; I'm gonna have to spit to get the taste out of my mouth . . ." Ebert continues, "Oops. Sorry, Gene." Dilbert points the remote control at the tv and changes the channel as he says, "I hate when they do these theme shows."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 29, 1989's comic on:

Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #question, #asking, #stupid

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Dogbert sit outdoors. Dogbert says, "I have a stupid question . . ." Dilbert says, "There are no stupid questions." Dogbert says, "That's ridiculous . . . If there are no stupid questions then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time to ask questions?" Dilbert asks, "Were you going to ask me something?" Dogbert replies, "See . . . Now there's a stupid question."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 17, 1990's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #hitchcock, #movie, #sequel, #alfred hitchcock, #the fish

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dogbert says, "Let's go see the new Alfred Hitchcock movie." Dilbert asks, "How could there be a 'new' Hitchcock movie?" Dogbert replies, "It's some kind of a sequel." Dilbert and Dogbert sit in a movie theater watching "Alfred Hitchcock presents The Fish."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 23, 1990's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #boss, #job, #sez, #raise, #bench, #outside, #project, #stupid

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert, Dogbert and a man sit on a park bench. The man says, ". . . So then I sez to my boss, 'You can just stuff this stupid project . . .'" The man continues, "Then I sez, 'Let's see YOU do this job.' And I sez, 'I should get a raise.' I gotta go." Dogbert says, "The more they sez 'I sez,' the less likely it is they really said what they sez they said."