Flood Victim Comic Strips
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29 Results for Flood Victim
View 1 - 10 results for flood victim comic strips. Discover the best "Flood Victim" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday September 01,
1994
Tags #macro economics, #diagram, #flood victim, #mechanical pencil, #erase
Transcript
Professor: Lets start with a brief refresher in macro economics. This diagram explains why Im and expert in money yet I dress like a flood victim. You'll have no trouble with the rest of the course unless your mechanical pencil jammed...lets erase....
Tuesday May 15,
1990
Tags #Dogbert, #ambush, #victim, #fantasized, #marrying, #rich, #guy, #ditching, #career, #yarn, #sticking, #briefcase, #woman
Transcript
Dogbert walks down the sidewalk holding a microphone. Dogbert thinks, "Dogbert the Ambush Reporter looks for another victim." Dogbert approaches a woman carrying a briefcase and asks, "Is it true you have often fantasized about marrying a rich guy and ditching your career?" The woman covers her face with her hands and cries, "Yes!!! Yes!!! And I . . . I . . . Secretly learned to COOK!!" Dogbert asks, "Is that YARN sticking out of your briefcase?!!"
Wednesday July 03,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #garbage, #man, #stand, #legal, #kill, #ear, #corntwo, #conditions, #victim, #witch, #poodle
Transcript
Dogbert stands in front of the judge's bench and says, "I call my garbage man to the stand, because he knows everything." The garbage man sits in the witness stand and says, "According to the Iowa Corn Treaty of 1837, it is LEGAL to kill a man with an ear of corn under two conditions . . ." The garbage man continues, "One: if the victim is a witch or two: if he owns a poodle." Dogbert says, "For my next witness, I call 'Fifi.'"
Tuesday April 22,
1997
Tags #family freindly, #policy, #childless people, #tax, #child care, #lower profit sharing, #time off, #pick up slack, #victim
Transcript
Dilbert tells Alice, "This so-called 'Family Friendly' policy is like a tax on childless people." Dilbert continues, "You get child-care; I get lower profit-sharing. YOU get time off for family; I get to pick up your slack . . ." Dilbert says, "I'm a victim, but in some strange way I'm enjoying it." Alice makes a fist and rolls up her sleeve. She says, "Then you'll love this."
Friday February 27,
1998
Tags #victim of curse, #20/20, #john stossel, #shows cure, #commercial, #valuable information, #old nemesis, #tv shows
Transcript
Dilbert, cursed by both Dogbert and the World's Smartest Garbage Man, sits watching television. He has Dogbert's eyes and nose and is dressed in garbage man coveralls. The tv says, "Are you the victim of a curse?" Dilbert says, "Yes, I am." The tv says, "Next on 20/20, John Stossel shows you the cure." Dilbert's ears shoot straight up and his garbage man hat flies off. Dilbert pokes his head in the doorway and says, "Ha! After the commercial I will get valuable information for people like me!" Dogbert wags his tail and says, "Well, well. It seems my old nemesis, John Stossel, was been busy."
Friday January 18,
2002
Tags #demo, #good sale, #sales training, #see coming, #selling, #sucker, #victim, #wedgie, #gullible
Transcript
Headline: Sales Training. The speaker points to a picture of an overly smiley man. He says, "Don't act like you're selling something." The speaker points to a picture of a man getting a wedgie. He says, "A good sale is like a good wedgie. Your victim shouldn't see it coming." The speaker continues, "For this next demonstration I need a volunteer who can't see what's coming." The man next to Dilbert raises his hand.
Saturday March 13,
2004
Tags #manipulate, #lying, #Advice, #mayo clinic, #victim to source
Transcript
Dogbert: "You can manipulate people by lying about what other people said." "If your victim goes to the source and discovers your treachery, say, of course he tells you that." Dilbert: "Your advice doesn't sound healthy." Dogbert: "That's not what the Mayo Clinic said."
Tuesday February 05,
2013
Tags #deception, #fake websites, #gullibility, #idiopathy epidemic, #internet & world wide web, #search engine, #slap the victim
Transcript
Alice: I've learned to control reality by creating fake websites and doing search engine optimization. Boss: Did you hear about the idiopathy epidemic? They symptoms include pointy hair and gullibility. The only treatment is for someone else to slap the victim. Alice: Ask for it like you mean it.
Saturday October 04,
2014
Tags #pretending, #rehab, #victim, #work ethic, #workaholic, #effect health, #dramatic, #blaming victim
Transcript
Wally: I'm pretending to be a workaholic so the company will pay for rehab. Waaaa!!! I am working too hard! It is starting to affect my health! Boss: That seemed a bit dramatic. Wally: Here we go with blaming the victim.
Friday October 25,
2019
Work Life Balance
Tags #business, #interviewee, #interview, #employer, #company, #healthy, #work, #life, #balance, #victim
Transcript
boss: tell me what you are looking for in an employer interviewee in suit: i want a company that appreciates a healthy work-life balance. boss: you have a bit of a victim vibe interviewee: i was hoping that didn't show