Search Results for "fly on plane"
Share June 19, 2001's comic on:
Dilbert stands in front of an airline desk speaking with a flight attendant. The flight attendant says, "We overbooked. But I can give you the co-pilot's seat if you know how to fly a 747." Dilbert stands in front of a long line of people and says, "Um...Yeah, okay. I can fly a 747." Dilbert is in the cockpit of a plane with another guy. Dilbert asks, "Should I do something?" The guy replies, "Beats me. I'm a chiropractor."
Share October 23, 2005's comic on:
Catbert: Evil Director of Human Resources "I have new guidelines on who can fly on the same plane." "We can't risk losing too many key employees." "The CEO and the president are not allowed to be on the same flight." "No more than three vice presidents may be on the same flight." "What are the guidelines for interns?" "Infinite interns are allowed on the same flight. You are also allowed to run with scissors and put plastic bags over your heads." "How many interns are allowed per plastic bag?"
Share January 27, 2011's comic on:
The Boss says, "Asok, I need you to go to Elbonia. It's too cold for airplanes to operate there, so you'll need to use the underground route." The Boss says, "Fly into Switzerland and follow the sewer systems from there. Stick to the side of the sewer where it's dryer." Asok says, "It's a sewerside mission!" The Boss says, "You'll need a warm jacket and a rat hammer."
Share December 08, 2011's comic on:
Boss: I need you to fly to Seattle for a quick meeting. Dilbert: Will I be meeting with a newly discovered Stone Age tribe that has never used Skype? Boss: No. Dilbert: Then I'm totally confused.
Share May 24, 1990's comic on:
Dilbert and a woman sit at a restaurant table eating dinner. Dilbert asks, "So . . . Uh . . . Why did you decide to take up witchcraft?" The woman replies, "It comes in handy." The woman points to a fly circling the table and says, "For example, suppose I want to get rid of this annoying fly here." The woman turns Dilbert into a frog and says, "Now be a luv . . ."
Share February 18, 1991's comic on:
Dilbert sits at a table and yells as a test tube flies out of his hands, "It works!! My anti-gravity formula works!!!" Dilbert continues, "If I drink it, I'll be able to fly! I'll be famous. People will shower me with praise and admiration!!" Dilbert sits on the wall over the television and says to Dogbert, "Notice anything?" Dogbert replies, "A pathetic bid for attention?"
Share January 07, 1992's comic on:
Dilbert sits at his desk. The Boss stands behind him holding a fly swatter. The Boss says, "Hold still. I'm going to try a morale-building experiment." The Boss slaps Dilbert on the back of his head. The Boss walks away saying, "Thanks. I feel a lot better." Dilbert looks angry.
Share June 29, 1992's comic on:
Dilbert and Dogbert sit in airplane seats. Dilbert says, "This will be our most memorable vacation yet." The flight attendant says, ". . . And in the event of a snowy mountainside crash, the young and feeble passengers are completely edible." As the plane flies by a mountain into which three planes have crashed, the flight attendant says, "But Captain Bob promises he won't make that mistake again."
Share January 31, 1996's comic on:
Wally sits at his desk and thinks, "Wally writes the critical code for our nation's new air traffic control system. The crowd is silent." Wally thinks, "Suddenly the gifted programmer employs a rarely seen strategy of 'code reuse.' The crowd goes wild." Dilbert, Wally and Alice sit a table eating lunch. Dilbert asks Wally, "So you used code from the payroll system?" Wally replies, "Here's a tip: don't fly on pay day."
Share September 11, 1997's comic on:
Alice leans into the conference room where Wally and Dilbert are sitting at the table. Alice says, "I just heard that our pointy-haired boss's plane crashed." Wally says, "I must admit I have mixed feelings." Dilbert says, "You don't know if you should mourn or celebrate, right?" Wally says, "No, I mean celebrate or leave early." Asok the Intern walk in wearing a party hat and says, "Hurry if you want some cake."