Follows Man Comic Strips
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1000 Results for Follows Man
View 1 - 10 results for follows man comic strips. Discover the best "Follows Man" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday May 03,
2008
Tags #new guy, #project team, #foul stench, #stink of failure, #follows man
Transcript
Man says, "You must be Dilbert. I'm the new guy on your project team." Dilbert says, "What's that foul stench?" Man says, "It's the stink of failure. It follows me around from project to project." Dilbert says, "How do I get if off?!!" Man says, "You can dilute it by shaking hands."
Tuesday December 05,
1989
Tags #garbage man, #Dilbert, #garbage, #equations, #engineer, #calculations
Transcript
Dilbert opens his door and the garbage man stands on the doorstep. The garbage man holds up a crumpled piece of paper and says, "Pardon me, sir, but I couldn't help noticing these equations in your garbage." The garbage man continues, "I took the liberty of correcting a few quantum calculations." Dilbert asks, "Gosh, why are you a garbage man?" The garbage man replies, "I think the question is 'why are YOU an engineer?'"
Wednesday December 06,
1989
Tags #garbage man, #Dogbert, #glamour, #jobs, #choose, #smartest
Transcript
Dogbert says to the garbage man, "I understand you're the world's smartest garbage man." Dogbert continues, "I'm Dogbert, the world's smartest dog; according to me, anyway." Dogbert continues, "I just wondered why you choose to be a garbage man." The garbage man says, "I think it was the glamour which first intrigued me."
Friday May 18,
1990
Tags #Dogbert, #probing, #embarassing, #questions, #contemplating, #effects, #firecrackers, #investigative, #reporters, #wallace, #dog, #young man, #Kids, #interviews
Transcript
Dogbert follows a little boy, holds out a microphone and asks, "Excuse me, young man. May I ask you some probing and embarrassing questions?" Dogbert shakes the microphone in the boy's face and asks, "Is it true that you spend a great deal of time contemplating the effects of firecrackers on investigative reporters?!!" Smoke clouds rise from Dogbert's head and his fur is burned. Dogbert says, "I'll bet this hasn't happened to Mike Wallace even once."
Wednesday October 03,
1990
Tags #garbage man, #die, #cloning, #machine, #design, #math, #errors, #Dogbert, #Dilbert
Transcript
The garbage man asks Dogbert, "Not much garbage . . . Did somebody die?" Dogbert replies, "Dilbert went to the compost pile in the sky." The garbage man reads a piece of paper and says, "Bad timing . . . Judging from last week's garbage, he had almost finished his cloning machine design. I only notice a few linear math errors." The garbage man continues, "This design would just create a hologram and a bad chile con carne recipe." Dogbert says, "Man, you sure know your garbage!"
Friday May 10,
1991
Tags #Dogbert, #garbage man, #tranzanian, #necktie, #snake, #clever, #disguises
Transcript
Dogbert asks the garbage man, "Mister Garbage Man, do you know why Dilbert's neckties curl up?" The garbage man answers, "It could be a Tanzanian necktie snake in one of its clever disguises." The garbage man grasps his throat and continues, "They'll stalk you for years, then suddenly - ACK!!" Dogbert looks shocked.
Saturday May 11,
1991
Tags #Dogbert, #solve, #mystery, #dilbert's, #garbage man, #neckties, #present, #mysteries, #fuel, #wonder, #times, #apparently, #existential
Transcript
Dogbert sits on a trashcan and says to the garbage man, "Maybe I'll never solve the mystery of why Dilbert's neckties curl up." The garbage man says, "Sometimes, Dogbert, life presents us with mysteries to fuel our sense of wonder . . . It stimulates us to reach beyond ourselves to something greater." Dogbert asks, "This isn't one of those times, is it?" The garbage man says, "Apparently not."
Wednesday July 03,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #garbage, #man, #stand, #legal, #kill, #ear, #corntwo, #conditions, #victim, #witch, #poodle
Transcript
Dogbert stands in front of the judge's bench and says, "I call my garbage man to the stand, because he knows everything." The garbage man sits in the witness stand and says, "According to the Iowa Corn Treaty of 1837, it is LEGAL to kill a man with an ear of corn under two conditions . . ." The garbage man continues, "One: if the victim is a witch or two: if he owns a poodle." Dogbert says, "For my next witness, I call 'Fifi.'"
Friday February 28,
1992
Tags #garbage man, #election, #campaign, #strategist, #Win, #promise, #sell, #foreigners, #profits, #parks
Transcript
The garbage man says to Dogbert, "Sure, Dogbert, I'll be your election campaign strategist." The garbage man sits at a table with Dogbert and Ratbert. The garbage man says, "You can win if you promise to sell our national parks to foreigners and share the profits." Dogbert replies, "I couldn't do that." The garbage man asks, "You couldn't sell the parks?" Dogbert replies, "I couldn't share the profits."
Tuesday October 12,
1993
Tags #Dogbert, #executive man, #business meeting, #assistants
Transcript
An executive says, "The motion is approved. Dogbert is our new company president because he has the best hair." Dogbert says to a man who follows him taking notes, ". . . Bulldoze the employee cafeteria and put in my helicopter pad . . . And I need a few office improvements . . ." Dogbert points to the floor in front of his desk and says to the assistant, "We need a trap door here, but it won't be funny unless you can give me some 'flushing' sounds."