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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 11, 1989's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #hot line, #telephone, #forehead, #phone calls

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Dilbert points to a telephone on the desk and says to Dogbert, "This is the new 'hot line' phone to the Kremlin. My company won the bid to engineer the new model." Dilbert says as he walks away, "That's a fully functional prototype, so don't mess with it." Dogbert picks up the phone and says, "So, Gorby, I understand you've been finger-painting with your forehead . . ."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 12, 1995's comic on:

Tags #original timeline, #12 months, #pitched in, #exact end date, #cold dark, #cheunk, #coal, #size, #forehead, #need flashlights, #sweaters, #nippy

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The Boss sits at a desk. Dilbert reads a printout and says, "Our original project time line was twelve months . . . But since you pitched in to help . . ." Dilbert continues, "I don't have an exact date, but it's roughly the same time that the sun becomes a cold dark chunk of coal the size of your forehead." The Boss says, "We'll need flashlights." Dilbert says, "And sweaters. It could get nippy."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 04, 1996's comic on:

Tags #promoted ted, #new manager, #new beard, #grow from forehead, #wrong, #punish them, #bad opinions

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The Boss gestures toward Ted and says to Alice and Dilbert, "I promoted Ted to be your new manager. I used to think he looked boyish, but his new beard has changed that." Alice and Dilbert look shocked. Alice asks, "Are either of you the least bit concerned that Ted's beard is growing from his forehead?" As they walk away, Ted says to the Boss, "She made it sound as if it's wrong." The Boss says, "You can punish them for having bad opinions."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 21, 2000's comic on:

Tags #current version, #making changes, #slap forehead, #test software, #major changes

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The Boss asks Dilbert, "Can you test the software today?" Dilbert answers, "No. I'm making major changes Tuesday." The Boss replies, "You could test the current version." Dilbert slaps his forehead exasperated at the Boss' response. The Boss looks at Dilbert and says to himself, "I wish people wouldn't slap their foreheads and say 'Aye-yi-yi-yi' every time I talk."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 16, 2003's comic on:

Tags #india institute of technology, #huge brain, #mental superiority, #re heat tea, #forehead, #fire

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Asok: "At the India Institute of Technology, I learned to use my huge brain." "But I try not to frighten ordinary people with any gratuitous displays of mental superiority." "For example, I no longer reheat my tea by holding it to my forehead and imagining fire."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 07, 2005's comic on:

Tags #do something, #let you know, #spitting on forehead, #whats worng

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"When you do something that I don't like, I'll let you know by cursing and then spitting on your forehead." "Maybe you could just tell me what I did wrong." "#*$@!"

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 03, 2005's comic on:

Tags #boss's pet, #bully staff, #forehead wrinkles, #hired

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I see that you have lots of experience as a boss's pet. "Show me the face you'll use when you bully my staff behind my back." "Okay." "Nice use of forehead wrinkles. You're hired." "Grrrr..."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 14, 2007's comic on:

Tags #forehead, #pasword, #wrote down, #forget, #123, #can't see, #asks, #memory, #foregtful, #skin, #ink

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The Boss: "What does my forehead say?" "I keep forgetting my password, so I wrote it on my head." Dilbert: "Is your password 123?" The boss: "I just said I don't know."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 27, 1989's comic on:

Tags #death, #waiting, #medical

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Dilbert sits at his desk. The Grim Reaper enters and says, "Gilbert, your time has come." Dilbert says as beads of sweat fly off his forehead, "Gilbert?! My name is DILBERT! You have the wrong guy!" The Grim Reaper says, "Oops! Sorry. Mind if I just wait around until your number comes up?"

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 30, 1989's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #flies, #dolphins, #killing, #aspca

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Dilbert kills a fly with a fly swatter. Dogbert asks, "Why is it okay to kill flies but not okay to kill dolphins?" Dogbert continues, "Is the poor fly any less deserving of our respect and protection?" Dilbert raises the fly swatter and says, "Hold still . . . There's a dolphin on your forehead." Dogbert says, "I've added the A.S.P.C.A. to our speed dialer."