Dilbert answers the door and says, "Hello . . . Wait, aren't you . . .?" The person at the door answers, "Ed McMahon." Ed McMahon asks, "Do you remember that sweepstakes entry you mailed?" Dilbert replies excitedly, "Yes yes!!" Ed McMahon hands Dilbert a letter and says, "You forgot to put a stamp on it."
Dilbert and an auto mechanic look under the hood of Dilbert's car. Dilbert says, "I think it's my fuel pump." The mechanic asks, "Your what?" Dilbert replies, "What I mean is I think it's my @*!# fuel pump." The mechanic says, "Well, why didn't you just #$@* say so?" Dilbert replies, "Sorry . . . I forgot where I was."
Dilbert stands at a desk in front of a computer and video camera. Dilbert says, "It's called multimedia, Dogbert. Now I can include video and music with my computer programs." Dilbert continues, "This morning I added my face plus the theme song from 'Star Wars' to my budget spreadsheet." Dilbert continues, "I already forgot how I survived without it." Dogbert replies, "It can get pretty ugly when science and art collide."
"From now on, Bob please refer to me as a 'rattus', not by the diminutive term 'rat'."
"Frankly, I've never thought of folks like you in terms of your genus. I see you as part of a larger community."
"Really?"
"Yeah - the community of things that go 'sqeak' when I step on them."
"That's so funny I forgot to laugh."
Dilbert leans out his cubicle door and yells, "Hey, Wally! The Boss sent his first e-mail message!" Dilbert says to Wally who stands behind him, "And you said he wasn't bright enough to figure out how to use e-mail!" Wally asks, "What's his message?" Dilbert reads the message, "I forgot my watch. Does anybody know what time it is?" Wally says, "Time to change jobs."
Asok: The conference call was a huge sucess. "Three out of 15 people were available and only one of them forgot to call in."
The boss: "So it was a phone call between two people?"
Asok: "It would have been if they hadn't used the mute buttons."
Dogbert's password recovery service for morons
Ned: I done forgot my password.
Dogbert: What's your name?
Ned: My name is Ned, I think.
Is your password 'Ned'?
Ned: Sweet baby jeepers, you're like some sort of Nostrildogmas!" Dogbert: Here's a brochure for my cult.
Tina: Dilbert asked me a question in front of the entire group that I already answered last week.
What kind of game is he playing?"
Alice: Maybe he forgot your answer.
Tina: That's crazy talk."
Tina: You're late, as always.
Dilbert: You mean twice. If you include the time you forgot to set your watch back an hour. And this time when you e-mailed the wrong start time?
Tina: Oh, look how you try and flip it around!"
Wally is the new VP of Finance A troll says, "I moved all of our cash to a secret offshore bank." The troll says, "But I forgot to write down the account number. Or the password. Or the name of the country." The troll says, "And... I'm not entirely sure it was a bank." Wally thinks, "First day, not so good."
