Four Boxes Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

128 Results for Four Boxes

View 1 - 10 results for four boxes comic strips. Discover the best "Four Boxes" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 05, 1997's comic on:

Tags #rather the consultant, #strategy optuons, #matrix, #four boxes, #something, #phase two, #concentric circles, #labels and arrows

View Transcript

Transcript

Ratbert stands in front of a dry erase board and says, "Your strategy options can be shown in this matrix." Dilbert and the Boss sit at a conference table listening to the presentation. Ratbert continues, "The four boxes are 'Something . . . Something . . . Some other thing and whatever.'" Ratbert continues, "In phase two I hope to turn this matrix into concentric circles with labels and arrows." The Boss thinks, "I'm under the consultant's spell."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 07, 1996's comic on:

Tags #performance review, #daughter, #cub girl cookies, #volume level, #downsizer, #low performer, #fast tracker, #united way chairperson

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss tells Dilbert, "I'll be writing your performance review this afternoon." The Boss continues, "But this morning I'm helping my daughter sell cub girl cookies." The Boss continues, "For your shopping convenience I have assigned a name to each volume level." Dilbert reads, "Zero to four boxes is the 'downsizer' volume . . ." Dilbert reads, "Five to eight boxes is the 'low performer' volume level." Dilbert writes on the order form and says, "Let's say six hundred boxes." The Boss says, "Ahh . . . The 'fast tracker.' An excellent choice." Dilbert asks, "What's your daughter's name?" The Boss says, "Ooh . . . Gotta go." Wally says, "I only bought twelve boxes. Now I'm the 'United Way' chairperson." Dilbert says, "I just signed your name for six hundred more."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 27, 1991's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #date, #new, #system, #evaluating, #check, #boxes, #Card, #night, #dinged, #point, #nervous, #twitch, #head, #block, #bucket

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and a woman sit at a table in a restaurant. The woman says, "I'm using a new system for evaluating my dates. I just check off boxes on this card throughout the night." The woman continues, "There . . . I just dinged you a point for that nervous twitch." The woman asks, "Would you say your head is more like a block or a bucket?"

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 02, 1994's comic on:

Tags #diversity training, #respect differences, #four groups, #insults group, #dog, #teaching, #workers, #animals, #education

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: In 'diversity sensitivity' training you will learn to respect those who are different. DOgbert: People basically fall into these four groups. ugly smart cute smart ugly stupid cute stupid Dilbert: This is different than I expected. Dogbert: I notice that all of you are in this box here.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 23, 1995's comic on:

Tags #perfromance appraisel, #four years, #starting documentation, #fire me later, #24 hours aday, #motivational

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss stands behind Alice's desk and says, "Alice, I'm almost done with your performance appraisal." Alice looks horrified and gasps. Alice turns her chair to face the Boss and says, "I haven't had an appraisal in four years. You must be starting a documentation trail so you can fire me later." Alice types wildly and yells, "I'LL WORK 24 HOURS A DAY!!" The Boss thinks, "That was way more motivational than I'd hoped."

View more books now

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 12, 1995's comic on:

Tags #two week retreat, #mountains, #management retreat, #four star hotle, #no room, #brag, #employees, #glib, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Dilbert, Wally and Alice, "Have fun working. I'm off to the two-week management retreat in the mountains." The Boss continues, "It's so sad you can't come. I guess there isn't room at the four-star hotel." As he flees from books and folders being hurled at him, the Boss thinks, "Now I know why it's called a retreat."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 11, 1990's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #wage, #benefits, #package, #disloyalty, #verbal, #abuse, #occasional, #legal, #problems, #twenty-four, #hours, #recognition, #positively, #giddy, #toaster

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits at a desk. Dilbert says, "Yes?" Dogbert says, "I'm demanding a new wage and benefits package." Dilbert says, "I already give you everything you want . . ." Dilbert continues, "And in return you give me disloyalty, verbal abuse and occasional legal problems." Dogbert says, "Okay, it's a good job, but I'm putting in twenty-four hours a day!" Dogbert continues, "I think I deserve some sort of special recognition for my good work." An "Employee of the Month" poster with Dogbert's picture hangs on the refrigerator. Dogbert says, "I'm positively giddy." Dilbert says, "You edged out the toaster by two votes."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 24, 1996's comic on:

Tags #become mimes, #blame the mimes, #debug, #elbonia, #four million dollars, #one million dollars, #quality assurance, #software, #programmers, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert points to a diagram on an overhead projector. Dilbert says to the Boss, "You saved one million dollars by having programmers in Elbonia write software for us." Dilbert continues, "But we wasted four million dollars trying to debug the software." Dilbert continues, "And the entire staff of our quality assurance group quit to become mimes." The Boss responds, "Let's blame the mimes; they won't talk."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 17, 1997's comic on:

Tags #four hour meeting, #surrogate social life, #bring chips, #wish, #had a spine

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina stands behind Asok's desk and says, "You're invited to a four-hour meeting, Asok." Asok looks at the agenda and says, "Tina, it would seem that all of your meetings have no purpose other than to provide you with a surrogate social life." Tina asks, "Can you bring chips?" Asok says, "I wish, I wish, I wish I had a spine."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 27, 1998's comic on:

Tags #deputy of common sense, #four hour meeting, #behind schedule, #agenda, #morale is low

View Transcript

Transcript

During a staff meeting, Dogbert stands on the table holding his gun and says, "FREEZE!!" Dogbert is dressed as a policeman and says, "You scheduled a four-hour meeting to find out why people are behind schedule!" The guy says, "No, look at the agenda! The fourth hour is about why morale is so low. A woman next to him whispers to Dogbert, Shoot him."