Search Results for "funerals"
Share August 22, 2000's comic on:
Catbert the Evil HR Director says to the staff, "Employees waste too much time at funerals." Catbert continues, "On a related note, our heating costs are too high." Later at home, Dilert's mother says to Dilbert, "As a matter of fact, I would mind being cremated in the company furnace."
Share April 24, 2014's comic on:
Dilbert: Experts say I can improve my likeability by showing that I remember things that people have told me. For example, there was the time you said you always go to funerals dressed as a clown to keep things light. Ted: I never said that! Dilbert: Are you sure? I told everyone you did.
Share March 30, 2012's comic on:
Carol: I've been reading our bereavement policy and I found a problem. I get three days off if my husband eats nothing but unhealthy food and dies young. And I'm the one who does our grocery shopping. Boss: Sounds like a conflict of interest. Carol: I'm glad I'm not the only one who sees it.
Share July 24, 2012's comic on:
Dilbert: When I die, I want my ashes scattered in outer space. Dogbert: Cool! I'll bribe an Elbonian general to strap you to their intercontinental missile when we test it next week. Dilbert: It's better if the dying and the ash scattering are separate events. Dogbert: Don't be a burden on the living.
Share November 13, 2014's comic on:
Boss: I need you to organize some sort of memorial thing for Fred. Carol: You mean Ted. Boss: I'm thinking cake and balloons in the break room. Is that tasteful enough? Carol: I could hire a mime to pretend he's in an invisible box.