Dogbert stands in a dark classroom holding a pointer and using an overhead projector. Dogbert says, "This is the story of Clayton the Auto Mechanic." Dogbert continues, "Clayton smoked cigars while working on gasoline engines. What problem did this cause?" The projector shows an explosion. A man wrapped in bandages says, "He was hit by lightning every time?" Dogbert asks, "Does anybody beside Clayton have a guess?"
Dilbert stands at Carol's desk. Dilbert says, "....And one box of those big binder clips...." Carol's phone rings. Carol screams into the phone, "Timmy, unite the neighbors and do your homework." Dilbert says, "Maybe I'll come back later." Carol says, "Do NOT light that gasoline!!"
Dogbert, VP of marketing
PR: "As head of public relations, it will be my job to explain your marketing claims."
Dogbert: "So?"
PR: "You claim our product can turn tap water into unleaded gasoline and reanimate the dead."
Dogbert: "Are you asking my to do a lousy job of marketing just so your job is easier?"
PR: "Um..."
dogbert: i made a deal with all of the subordinates who accused you of inappropriate behavior. they will stop talking to the press if you agree to let them douse you with gasoline and set you on fire.
ceo: that's the best deal you could get me?
dogbert: in all fairness, they are great negotiators, and i don't like you.
