Genius Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

54 Results for Genius

View 1 - 10 results for genius comic strips. Discover the best "Genius" comics from Dilbert.com.

It's Hard To Be A Misunderstood Genius

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
It's Hard To Be A Misunderstood Genius - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #genius, #intelligence, #misunderstood

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: It's hard to be a misunderstood genius. CEO: I have no idea what you're talking about. Wally: See?

Top Dilbert Searches

marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac

Genius Marketing

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Genius Marketing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #sarcasm, #products, #sales, #team, #shoddy, #incompetent, #marketing, #genius, #correct, #blush

View Transcript

Transcript

dogbert: your products are shoddy, and your sales teams are incompetent. but there is a theoretical amount of marketing genius that can fix all of that. boss: are you that genius? dogbert: please. you're making me blush.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #interviews, #ignorant and bored, #hired, #awesome tech skills, #management genius

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: You're ignorant and ridiculous. I'm bored. Are we done here? Boss: You're hired. You must have awesome technical skills or else someone would have killed you by now. Boss: I can't tell if I'm a management genius or just lazy.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #annoyance, #competition (psychology), #tweaks to ideas, #fails, #claim credit, #many forms genius, #steaming an oval

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I made a few tweaks to your idea. Now if it fails it was your idea, and if it works I can claim credit. Boss: Genius comes in many forms. Dilbert: Such as steaming and oval?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #genius, #iqs, #Dilbert, #network, #enhance, #career, #mensa, #expo

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Dogbert sit at the table. Dogbert asks, "You joined what?" Dilbert replies, "Mensa. It's a group of people with genius IQs." Dilbert continues, "I'm hoping it will be a good way to network and enhance my career." The garbage man says to Dilbert, "I heard you joined our Mensa group . . . I hope you can make it to the career expo."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #genius, #humility, #Dogbert, #weasel, #compliments, #clever

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his desk. Dogbert says from behind him, "I'm not really a genius." Dilbert asks, "Did you say something?" Dogbert replies, "I'm practicing my false humility." Dilbert asks, "Is this just a way to weasel more compliments out of people?" Dogbert replies, "Oh, I could never be THAT clever."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #doctor, #patients, #turbocharged, #x-ray, #machine, #waiting, #room, #eyes, #diagnoses, #arrive, #mail, #stroke, #genius, #schedule, #hypochondriacs

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert, who is holding a stethoscope, says to a room full of people, "Attention, all patients!" Dogbert continues, "I have turbocharged the x-ray machine and aimed it at the waiting room. Everybody close your eyes for five minutes then leave. Your diagnoses will arrive by mail." Dogbert walks away saying, "It was a stroke of genius to schedule all of the hypochondriacs for the same day."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #tina, #tech writer, #first draft, #boring, #presence of genius

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss hands Tina the Tech Writer a document and says, "Your first draft was boring, so I added a bunch of exclamation points." Tina reads the document and says, "Wow! Those exclamation points make this technical document come alive!" The Boss thinks, "This might be that sarcasm thing I keep hearing about." Tina hugs the document and cries, "I'm in the presence of genius! I beg you to father my children!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bob, #budget analyst, #delegate, #dinosaur, #engineers, #find dumber customers, #letter, #marketing genius, #new vp, #senior mangement, #wedgies

View Transcript

Transcript

Bob the dinosaur; gives wedgies to corporate people who deserve it. Budget analyst I don't understand any of our projects, I cut the ones with "E" In their names. BOB: What was that letter? analysts: EEEE! Engineers Wally: we doubled our costs, to add back up systems. Dilbert: You ant be too careful. Bob: two at once. In case one enjoys it. Wally: MMMM Marketing genius Market segmentation is the key. Dont improve the product just find dumber customers! Senior management BOB: These guys know how to delegate! You're the new VP of wedgies.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #person, #project, #headcount, #contract employee, #buy a computer, #over budget, #renting expensive, #Wally, #16 hour days, #boss thinks genius, #project cancelled

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert approaches the Boss and says, "We desperately need another person on my project!" The Boss replies, "We're already over headcount. Get a contract employee." Dilbert says, "Okay, but they cost twice as much." Dilbert says, "Plus we need to buy a computer." The Boss says, "Rent one. We're over our capital budget." Dilbert replies, "Renting is expensive. We'll go over our expense budget." The Boss says, "I'll fire Wally. That will free up some cash." Dilbert throws his arms up in frustration and says, "Wally's on my project!" Dilbert shouts, "Forget it! I'll just work sixteen hours a day!!" The Boss thinks, "That worked out perfectly. I think I might be a genius or something." The Boss sits at his desk and thinks, "I wonder if I should have told him the project was cancelled last week."