Search Results for "great gift"

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.
1 - 10 of 376

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 08, 1996's comic on:

Tags #minor edits, #product brochure, #causes hallucinations, #sterility, #positive spin, #greatest writing challenge, #same old sights, #great gift, #conscince, #three pager

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Tina the Tech Writer, "Tina, we need a few minor edits on our product brochure." Tina sits at her desk and thinks, "Minor? Uh-oh . . ." The Boss continues, "We've discovered that our product causes hallucinations and sterility." The Boss continues, "See if you can put a positive spin on that." Tina thinks, "This will be my greatest writing challenge yet." Tina types, "Are you tired of the same old sights? We've got you covered." Tina types, ". . . Makes a great gift for those people who - in your opinion - should not reproduce." Tina thinks, "Ooh . . . I feel a tiny pang of conscience. That's one." Dilbert asks, "So the brochure was only a three-panger?" Tina replies, "Yeah, and I think I faked the third one."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 24, 1992's comic on:

Tags #christmas presents, #Dogbert, #christmas, #gift, #hat, #humane, #society, #sweater

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert looks at a present under the Christmas tree and thinks, "I can't believe he only got ONE gift for me. This is an outrage." Dogbert thinks, "And he already told me it's a hat. A great dog like me, and he buys a hat?" A man at the Humane Society says into a telephone, "There's nothing we can do . . . Unless it has a matching sweater . . ."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 20, 2011's comic on:

Tags #time travel, #elbonia, #time, #70 years future, #great grandson, #set thing, #won't work out, #cave, #pool, #monster, #gun

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I hope I'm not calling too late. What time is it in Elbonia? Elbonian: We're seventy years in your future. I'm the great grandson of the guy you are trying to reach. By the way, that SETI thing won't work out the way you're hoping.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 26, 2011's comic on:

Tags #christmas presents, #sweaters, #ugly sweater, #lose a bet, #gift from mom, #hideous sweater

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: What's up with the ugly sweater? Did you lose a bet? Dilbert: This? Oh, right. It was a gift from my mom. I'm wearing it once in case she asks me later. Alice: Did you know it was hideous before I told you? Dilbert: Maybe.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 30, 2012's comic on:

Tags #how-to, #great leader, #book, #errors in book, #disgruntled underling, #existence, #break room

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I read a book about how to be a great leader, and realized I don't do any of those things. I'm surprised a book with so many errors could get published. It must have been written by a disgruntled underling. Wally: Do those exist?

View more books now

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 02, 1989's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #mysteries, #china, #great wall of china, #armies, #engineering, #flop

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Dogbert sit outdoors. Dilbert says, "And another of life's mysteries is, why do they call it the 'Great Wall of China?'" Dilbert continues, "It never really kept any invading armies out . . . Kind of a dismal flop from an engineering perspective." Dogbert says, "I don't think 'The Dismal Flop of China' would have the same tourist appeal." Dilbert replies, "I wouldn't pay to see it."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 11, 1990's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #aunt, #helen, #elbow warmer, #gift, #lowest, #creature, #dog, #Dogbert

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert reads a letter that says, "Dear Dilbert, I hope you like this elbow warmer I knitted for you. Love, Aunt Helen." Dilbert says to Dogbert, "It's an elbow warmer; just a thoughtful little gift from me to you." Dogbert says, "I feel like the lowest creature in the gift chain."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 22, 1990's comic on:

Tags #Dogbert, #ham, #cured, #butcher, #gift, #share

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert asks a butcher, "Do you have cured ham?" The butcher says, "Right here." Dogbert says, "Boy, if that's cured, what does a sick one look like?!" Dogbert walks down the sidewalk and says, "I've always felt a duty to share my gift of mirth with others."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 16, 1991's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #museum, #tazmanian, #woogat, #silk, #cheap, #polyester, #shirts, #wear, #gift, #shop

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert leads a man and a woman through the museum. Dogbert says, "'Dogbert's Museum of the Strange and Amazing' is the only place you can find . . ." Dogbert continues, ". . . A shirt woven entirely from a single thread of Tazmanian woogat silk." The man says, "It looks like the cheap polyester shirts that I wear." Dogbert says, "In that case, this is the gift shop."

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 27, 1991's comic on:

Tags #Dilbert, #great, #things, #dog, #nap, #time, #want, #tired, #hate, #life, #Dogbert

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert thinks, "One of the great things about being a dog is that we can take a nap any time we want." Dogbert continues thinking, "Sometimes we do it because we're tired." Dogbert lies on his back as Dilbert walks by carrying a briefcase. Dogbert thinks, "But mostly, we do it to make you hate your life."