Greatest Pleasure Comic Strips

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

46 Results for Greatest Pleasure

View 1 - 10 results for greatest pleasure comic strips. Discover the best "Greatest Pleasure" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #hazardous donuts, #free will, #illuison, #perceived path, #greatest pleasure, #rationalize, #deciosn, #mindless robot

View Transcript

Transcript

"You can't resist the shard-filled ultra-doughnuts even though you know the hazards." "Mmph" "Free will is an illusion. People always choose the perceived path of greatest pleasure." "Now, rationalize your decision, you mindless pink robot!" "I'm only having one."

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #[roducts name, #means something bad, #elbonian, #pleasure from wedgie, #thinking of trying, #elbonia

View Transcript

Transcript

We've just been informed that our product's name means something bad in the Elbonian language. "It means "the intense pleasure derived from giving yourself a wedgie."" "Thus was hatced the greatest prank ever perpetrated by Elbonia." "I gotta try that."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #courage, #electronic mail, #thinking, #greatest idea ever, #email

View Transcript

Transcript

Bad decision 1 Dilbert: This is the greatest idea ever. Why does it look so dumb when I put it in email? I'll sort it out later.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #competitors, #gadgets, #motorcycle, #smartphone, #threat, #worlds greatest

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I've created the world's greatest smartphone. Boss: Wow. This is so amazing that I'll need to kill you so our competitors never learn how to imitate it. Dilbert: Or you could give me a huge bonus. Boss: Okay, sure. I'll have a guy on a motorcycle attach it to your car.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #physical, #pleasure, #cosmic, #joy, #must, #shave, #rub, #stubble, #munk

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits on the floor across from a man in a robe. The ascetic says, "You must renounce all physical pleasure before you can achieve true cosmic joy." Dilbert replies, "Renounce it?! Heck, I don't think I've ever HAD a physical pleasure!" The spiritual advisor says, "And you must shave your head . . ." Dilbert says, "Oh, I get it; then you can rub the little stubble as it grows in!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #greatest accomplishemnts, #big raise, #draft, #white paper, #impact of work, #owls, #losy woodland, #habitats

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits in Dilbert's office with a laptop balanced on his lap. He says to Dilbert, "Tell me your greatest accomplishments at work. I'll use that to hype you up with your boss so you get a big raise." Dilbert says, "I wrote a draft of a white paper on a strawman process to reengineer our product process." Dogbert asks, "And what was the impact of that work?" Dilbert answers, I think some owls lost their woodland habitats."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #employee, #fish, #Dilbert, #strange, #nineties, #boss, #hug, #awkward, #pleasure, #outgrown, #uptight, #eighties

View Transcript

Transcript

A man tells the Boss, "You should have seen that fish . . ." The Boss holds his arms out and says, "That's nothing, compared to the fish I . . ." Dilbert walks around the corner. The Boss says, "Hi, Dilbert." Dilbert sees his outstretched arms and thinks, "He wants to hug me. That's strange. Okay, I'm a Nineties guy." Dilbert hugs him and says, "Hi, Boss." The Boss and the other man look shocked. Dilbert thinks, "Now I'll have to hug this guy so it doesn't seem awkward." Dilbert hugs the man and says, "Hi, it's a pleasure to meet you." Dilbert walks away thinking, "I'm glad we've outgrown the uptight Eighties."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #digital archive, #worlds greatest art, #fix the errors, #artists, #errors, #too much blue

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss, Wally and Dilbert sit at the conference table. The boss says, "We won the bid to create a digital archive of the world's greatest art." The boss says, "This will give us a chance to fix any errors made by the artists." Wally says, "Errors?" The boss says, "For example, there was a guy who used too much blue for a whole period."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #digitized, #indexed, #worlds greatest art, #last supper, #composition cluttered, #delete, #replace, #clip art, #bagels

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his computer. The boss stands. Dilbert says, "We've digitized and indexed the world's greatest art. This is 'The Last Supper.'" The boss says, "Nice but..." The boss says, "The composition is cluttered. Delete a few of those guys. Do you have any clip art of bagels?" The boss says, "Do they look happy?" Dilbert says, "Compared to me, yes."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #digital archive, #greatest art, #fixing artists mistakes, #funny story, #newsletter, #dramatically improving, #writer

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina the tech writer interviews Dilbert. Dilbert says, "I'm creating a digital archive of the world's greatest art. But my boss insists on "fixing" the artists' mistakes." Tina laughs. Tina the tech writer says, "This is such a funny story for the newsletter!" The boss sit at his desk. The boss says, "It's a funny story, but change 'fixing' to 'dramatically improving.'" Tina clenches her fists in agony.